Stop Using White “Sympathy” to Silence Black Rage

When I came across this article about a 16-year-old girl attacking an Uber driver with a machete, I was horrified. I can’t imagine the fear and pain that person experienced when what they thought was just another passenger turned out to be their murderer. I can’t begin to fathom how heartbreaking this must be for their family. But somewhere under my sympathy for this man and his loved ones, was an uncomfortable feeling about the way this story was reported.

Something wasn’t quite right. If you’re black (or even a little bit woke), you’ve probably already realized it. A white teenaged girl in Chicago shoplifted a machete and a knife, got into an Uber and murdered a man, but

✔️ Selfie (not mugshot — they’ve changed this since yesterday, but we still see y’all)

✔️ Tased (not shot)

✔️ Gently apprehended (not brutalized)

✔️ Alive, not dead

Kinda like Dylan Roof. Nothing like Tamir Rice.

POC in the comments of the article picked up on this. And they’re mad as hell about it, rightfully so.

But in the midst of our anger and frustration, along come the “All Lives Matter” white folks to ask stupid questions like:

“Why do y’all always have to make it about race?”

“You wanted the police to shoot her?”

“Where’s your sympathy for this man’s loss of life?”

If you are in the camp of white people who would ask these questions, read this very carefully:

We don’t make this about race. We know it’s about race. Just like you do (I refuse to believe you’re incapable of that basic reasoning). But unlike you, we’re not going to pretend it isn’t because our lives depend on fixing this shit.

We don’t want the police to shoot anybody, but we’d like some explanation as to why the Taylor Swifts and Justin Biebers of American crime can be apprehended alive while innocent black men and women like Sandra Bland and Philando Castile are dead. Explain to us why white criminals are presented as sweet, human, and mentally ill and black people are painted as thuggish, violent, and dangerous, even when we’re the victims. We’d like all of you to stop pretending that’s a coincidence. It’s not.

And we do have sympathy for this man’s loss of life. Our heart breaks. But you know what black people have learned to do, purely out of necessity? Be heartbroken about tragedy and angry about injustice at the same damn time. Centuries of oppression have forced us to learn how to do that all the time. Is your heart or mind too small for two emotions, two thoughts, simultaneously?

Which one is it? Which one allows you to talk over our anger, rage, frustration, devastation and heartache with your “Kumbaya, it’s not about race” nonsense?

I want you to know so I can show you how to fix it. Because all the sympathy you think you’re showing to this one victim is really thinly veiled apathy about the plight of black lives in America. And I’m not here for it.