Breaking Stereotypes Through Tiny Elevators
Before arriving to Paris, everyone I spoke to in the U.S. had an opinion about the politeness of Parisians. “They are arrogant” “they get annoyed when you speak English” “they are rude” etc.
I was prepared to experience what had been forewarned, but in my 5 days communicating with Parisians, opening with the common greeting “bonjour” followed by “parlez vous Anglais” (do you speak English) produced very pleasant interactions. I greeted them in their mother tongue but knew I would butcher anything beyond a few common phrases, so I directed the conversation to let them decide if they wanted to speak English. This is partly because I simply don’t ’t know the language, and partly because of my self-consciousness of sounding like an idiot American. So far, only one person refused to speak English — not bad! Maybe it’s because I overcompensated with a smile and non-verbal charm due to my lack of language skills, or maybe I was just lucky to find accommodating English speaking Parisians. Needless to say, my expectations of positive interactions were far surpassed.
A positive interaction I found the most surprising however was the elevator etiquette. Every single person in the elevator said hi and bye. Everyone. I was floored! When one person entered, each person in the elevator greeted the newcomer, upon each floor, every time. When one person left the elevator, each person said “Bonne journée” (have a nice day) or “au revoir”, upon each floor, every time.
In the New York office elevator, people rarely speak to each other or make eye contact, especially in the morning. It’s considered an extension of the morning commute and people are just rushing to get to their desks and get their morning coffee. It’s not considered rude, NYers are just keeping up with the quick pace of the city to get where they’re going. We don’t consider elevators to be the place to make interactions. The only elevators I’ve been to in Paris were at the Havas office so I didn’t know if this was a Havas Paris thing, or a broader cultural French thing. I had to find out more.
After my second day coming off of the elevator I sat down at my desk, looked out the window to my left for a view of the Eiffel tower and pondered this cultural difference. Could it be that the same group of people that I was warned were rude, were actually politer? At least in elevators that seemed to be the case. I started think about the elevators themselves, was there anything different about the structure? My first observation besides the etiquette was the size. The elevators in the Paris office are very narrow; barely two people can fit side by side. The NY office elevators are much larger, more than double the size. Perhaps the close proximity forced people to interact and I hypothesized that the elevator size must have something to do with it, because Parisians can’t be politer than Americans!
Upon a quick internet search about French etiquette, I found several articles describing the elevator culture and it’s clear that greeting someone in an elevator is a universal rule in France. I also mentioned this observation to my Paris office mates and they agreed that it is common courtesy to say hi to strangers in elevators. My theory about the elevator size had nothing to do with the etiquette, but you can understand my logic. I was once again pleasantly surprised to find that the French are not rude, and in fact, politer than Americans in this circumstance.
I must say that this elevator experience made me so happy. Not only did it break the stereotype that Parisians are rude, but it made me feel very welcomed in a foreign country where I’d be spending a significant amount of time.
Bonjour and au revoir. Two simple words that made a profound impact on my elevator experience and overall impression of French culture.
Fellow NY co-workers, next time you see me in the elevator expect a greeting! But don’t worry, I won’t try to make small talk before your morning coffee : )
