Improving Your Juggling Skills
Which ball should you drop when it all gets too much?
Paper, plastic, glass and metal, all my recycling bags were overflowing. I hate making the trip down all seventy-seven steps to the car twice, so I decided I would try and carry it all at the same time. Bad idea! Four steps down and a plastic bottle slid from the top of the pile and bounced on the grass. I bent over to pick up the offending item, only to lose four more items from another bag. By the time I reached the car, I was frustrated and had moved from achievement mode to complaining mode.
Unfortunately, this is a pattern. Not the dropping of my recycling part but the frustration part when I drop the ball. I’ve been trying to establish new habits in my life, healthy habits. Sometimes, that goes really well, and I feel like I’m conquering the world … and then I fail.
It takes time to build juggling skills.
If you’ve ever had a go at juggling, then you’ll know that at the beginning of the process, you’re going to drop the ball a lot! When I tried to juggle, dropping the ball didn’t bring condemnation; it brought laughter. I had a healthy expectation. I knew that dropping the ball didn’t mean long-term failure; it just meant that I was learning a new rhythm.
I need to remember that this also requires a new rhythm when I’m trying to establish a new habit. Two days ago, I had a two hundred-and-fifty-four-day streak on Duolingo (one of the language learning apps I use), and then I forgot to do it! I gave myself a tough time and was so fed up that I nearly packed the whole thing in. I don’t fully understand why I had that reaction, but I know I’m not alone. Whether you’re trying to stick to a diet, keep consistency in doing a devotional or endeavouring to keep your house tidy at some point, you’ll not always be able to stick to the plan.
When I dropped my recycling, it was the stuff precariously balanced on the top that fell on the ground; the items which were securely placed at the bottom of the bag weren’t under threat. In life, we have the option of ordering the importance of things in our lives. The most important should be the things we do first so we don’t drop them.
I’m not claiming that I’ve done this perfectly over the years; in fact, I haven’t! It’s the fact that I’ve got it wrong more than a time or two which has taught me what works and what doesn’t work.
I know this is basic, but if you want to prioritise something, put it in the morning slot on your calendar. I’m writing this early in the morning because my good intentions of writing an article kept getting swiped off the board as the day progressed and other things crowded in.
Morning Habits
I have three things I want to make sure I do every morning.
- Do my devotional
- Exercise
- Get ready for my day.
I’ve put them in that order deliberately. In the past, I tried exercising first, but then I found that a five-minute delay, a longer workout or getting into the bathroom last could throw off my schedule. My devotional, which for me means reading the Bible and spending some time praying about the day to come or the worries I’ve been carrying, would go out the window. Somehow, I didn’t have the brain capacity to focus on it late in the evening when I had another time slot available. I also find that if exercise doesn’t happen first, it’s torturous to do it later in the evening. It’s too easy to drop the ball! The ‘getting ready for the day’ slot isn’t just physically getting ready; it’s taking time to look at my calendar and mentally preparing myself.
I’m going to skip the obvious that the next slot on my calendar is work; although my work varies from day to day, it has to happen, and it happens at that time. It isn’t something that gets dropped, but lunch does! I’ve had to put lunch as firmly on the calendar like everything else; if not, I either miss it altogether or grab ten minutes. That’s not enough for a healthy lifestyle! Now, I take a lunch hour and guard it; that hasn’t been easy for me. I’m not saying I’m averse to putting the odd load of laundry in the washing machine over lunchtime, but I no longer allow it to be stolen. If there is unavoidable work during that time, I move my lunch hour so I can still have that break in the middle of the day.
Evening Habits
- Clear. After dinner, I always clear the table and do the dishes. When I was first married, this was not the case! I often entered the kitchen in the morning to be faced with a mountain of dirty dishes. I would search for a clean bowl or plate so I could eat breakfast and afterwards add it to the pile. Frequently, I was faced with having to wash dishes in the evening before cooking dinner. I realised that my biggest enemy in establishing this habit was sitting down to relax after dinner. Once I was on the sofa, watching TV or engrossed in a book, all thoughts of the disaster in the kitchen left my mind.
- Talk. It can be difficult to find time to spend with your spouse. Even if your after-dinner habit is sitting in the same room, it’s easy to zone out and not communicate with each other. Just delaying turning on the TV so you have time to catch up with each other can make a difference to the quality of your relationship. Your ‘talk time’ might be a little later once you’ve put the kids to bed, but make sure you grab the opportunity. In a way, it’s not unlike clearing the table and doing the dishes after dinner; talking can clean and clear your busy mind.
- Relax. We aren’t designed to constantly juggle. Relaxation is one thing I really struggle with, but it is something I’ve learned is necessary. Think for a moment what you’re still carrying, not just in terms of the physical load but the mental load. It’s not realistic to hold it 24/7. If you’re concerned about forgetting something, write it down; if you’re concerned about not getting things done, prioritise the one thing that’s most important, but the thing I find works best for me is bringing all those worries to God. That’s the one thing I refuse to let drop!
1 Peter 5:7 casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
