Hearts on Purpose
I found my great love. The kind that people spend their whole life searching for. The kind that people kill for. The kind that people die for. But I couldn’t have him. Or, he couldn’t have me, I should say. So we had to part. And I had to let go.
But there was one problem… I couldn’t let go. I couldn’t let go of this incredible feeling. I wanted it around all the time. How could I not? It was pure joy. Is that not what we seek? But I couldn’t have it. I wasn’t allowed.
That lingering craving, I salivated at the thought. But I didn’t want to want it. Because wanting it made me remember what it was like. And remembering what it was like made me miss it. And missing it forced me to recognize that it wasn’t there.
Regardless, I couldn’t get the taste of bliss out of my mouth no matter how much dirt I chewed on. I tried. I wanted to let go. I riddled for hours, because truth was the only thing that was ever powerful enough to triumph my passion.
I needed an answer. A reason. Something to stand on. A reason to let go. A reason why I shouldn’t have that love. Because as far as I knew, all signs pointed north and it was real hard to go on every day feeling like things were just wrong. Somehow, I had to make the wrong, become right.
The incredible bliss we shared. This reflection of one another. This spiritual prowess, this evolution of the souls. How could we not belong? We were so perfect. We fit. We liked so much of the same. Believed so much of the same. Agreed about so much and had discovered so much of the same truths. We were heading in so much of the same direction. It was perfect. And that made it so hard to deny. So it was even harder to rationalize that denial.
But you know, we were both already in this incredible space in our lives and our journey. This brilliant self-love, purpose, inner peace, a real gift. It’s sort of like we had both accidentally stumbled upon on the most beautiful song that had ever been witnessed by human ears.
It could heal pain, and inspire hope. It could deliver peace to uneasy souls. It could lift weary bones each morning and seduce one foot to move in front of the other. And we admired it so humbly. And we loved it the same. It had fixed us both when we were most shattered in our lives. And we were enchanted by it’s power.
So I guess it seemed frivolous, then… for the two of us to sit in the same room and revel in the magic of this song that we loved, over and over. It was unfair. And we were treading water.
We played the tune for one another in turn, hoping to incite catalysis, yet each of us was already saturated in the resulting evolution. Recycling joy and love and happiness back at its source again and again. Holding it hostage. Scrubbing hands that sparkled clean.
And we knew what we needed to do. It took us a selfish while to admit, but we knew. We had a responsibility. We had to share the song.
Witnessing that kind of beauty impresses the obligation to pass it on to others so they can experience it. People who need it more than us. And two of us in two different places, playing that song for other broken ears, brings twice as much joy in just as little time.
But in order for us to do that, to bring as much love to as many others as possible at once, we must part. Our duty was clear. There were others that needed our love far more than us.
