7 Reasons Why New Age Dating Is F*cked.
The never-ending journey becomes more exhilarating than the actual prize itself.
- WE GHOST AS A WAY OF ENDING THINGS.
Uncomfortable? Just don’t respond. We’ve all probably done this. And, We’ve all probably been ghosted too.
If this happened to us in real life we would be shattered but it’s over phone or text so we think it’s ok to do this to someone. NEWSFLASH: It’s not.
Even in the golden ages, the “Dear John” letter was left on the table in the foyer, but now, we’re lucky if you even get a typed string of characters saying “I’m sorry, it’s not working.”
2. WE’RE HYPER-FOCUSED ON SEX.
Sex is scarily available — we can have it simply with the swipe of a finger. There’s zero effort made into getting to know someone for who they truly are unless we’re willing to undress and show the most sacred parts of ourselves first.
And most of the time, sex doesn’t lead to a relationship — it leads to heartache, confusion, and another one-night stand with the next person.
3. WE’RE IN A COMPETITION OF WHO CAN CARE THE LEAST.
Showing actual emotions is heavily frowned upon. If we show our cards and act like we’re interested, it leaves the person we’re affectionate about turned off and running in the opposite direction instead of being flattered that we actually give a crap about them. There’s little gratitude for honest and happy emotions.
4. WE’RE TOO STRATEGIC ABOUT OUR RESPONSES.
Responding right away comes across as desperate and too available. It’s amazing how millennials view the luxury of having instant access to communication as something we need to treat as if we’re still using carrier pigeons.
Instant messaging is just that — it’s instant — but we still withhold our response times to try and show just how busy, important, and unattached we are. What backward and BS logic.
5. WE’VE BECOME CONTENT WITH BEING ALONE.
While we’ve been navigating the journey to find love, we’ve consequently committed our lives to ourselves and made them into something that’s happy and rewarding without someone to love, which means it’s that much harder to invite a relationship into our lives.
We’re fine on our own, so we won’t leave our comfort zones for anyone. Sometimes we even find minor and trivial reasons not to because we’re secretly happy with things just the way they are.
6. WE DON’T FEEL ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE PAIN WE INFLICT ON TO OTHERS.
When we’ve hurt someone’s feelings, we don’t feel even the slightest bit inclined to apologize or to make good on our wrongs. It’s not our problem — it’s theirs. A person’s emotions, even if caused by something we did or said, is up to them to resolve.
We feel entitled to walk around acting like complete losers with the expectation that the way it’s received is a reflection of the person we dump our stuff on and nothing to do with the fact that we were the cruel ones.
7. WE’RE OVERLOADED WITH OPTIONS.
We don’t believe we need to settle on anything because there’s always someone better looking with better family life, better hobbies, or someone with a better bank account.
We move from person to person and even if we land on someone that makes us feel great and we could totally devote ourselves to in a relationship, we’re never quite willing to give up the search. The never-ending journey becomes more exhilarating than the actual prize itself.
