The Journey Inside
It seems the world is always looking for accomplishments. To gain, to earn, to get. We never question why, we always just do and want something. For some reason we always feel like what we have and what we do is not enough, like we always want more or something else. We strive for a new home, a new job, a new country when in the end we want to change the place where we are. That place is not something we can see or have, it is something we should feel inside and it isn’t solved with anything we can buy.
I was always different. Never was thinking about the next best thing to own. I was always searching for something to add to my purpose I have in my mind, my freedom. When sickness came into my life, I knew I had to change my sense of freedom. I didn’t want to travel the world, so I decided to travel in my mind. I made sure my spirit and my soul got in this journey of wisdom and all I could do was read books, see movies, watch videos on the internet. Talk to people who have so much more wisdom within themselves than me. It was a different road than getting into my car and driving to another country, but for me, it gave me the same pleasure that nobody could take away from me.
Now I am not sure whether I’ve found the freedom I wanted as a little girl. To be honest, I don’t even know what I meant. Perhaps I just wanted to be free from the burden I’ve felt because of all the strange circumstances I experienced. Things I would never say, I guess. Maybe that is where my freedom is, when I am able to liberate the mysteries and secrets that I don’t want to talk about. When I say them, I need to acknowledge that they exist. I know, I could have met a lot of people, read a lot of books and traveled the world. If I don’t solve the greatest pain within me, I will never be free.
~Faye
