Hard first day on the job? Try becoming a Mom.

I have had over 20 jobs in my life. Many of those jobs had tough first days. But nothing can top the first day of motherhood.

The door opened, and the doctor ran in. The baby’s heart rate had been dropping on the monitor. I was finally fully dilated after fifteen hours of labor. This was the first baby for my husband and me, and he gripped my hand as we both tried to stay calm. I was ready to push; the nurse told me to get ready, then the monitor started beeping, and the doctor rushed in. They pulled in a portable ultrasound machine and quickly put jelly on the wand and my belly.

“The baby is breech,” the doctor yelled, “get her ready for an emergency C-section.”

“Really, after 15 hours of labor, you are figuring this out now,” I yelled back at the doctor as my husband stood there frozen.

She told me this was normal. I was in the recovery room, and my body would not stop shaking. I just delivered my first child four weeks early, and after the birth, they rushed my newborn to get extensive testing in the NICU.

I screamed at my husband, “follow her, do not let her out of your sight.” That may have come across as a bit aggressive; then again, that was not my concern at the moment.

They quickly wheeled me into the recovery room, and that is when the shaking started. My mind was reeling. This nurse kept prodding me. They laid my daughter on me for a few seconds before they whisked her away; she was screaming. I knew that was a good sign from the movies. She had dark hair like her dad. She was perfect.

I never knew you could get the shakes after giving birth, but now I know better. It took about an hour for my body to stop convulsing and calm down after giving birth. Having a C-section was not part of my plan, but this surprise was just a small hint of what was to come.

I was so relieved when they finally put me in a hospital room and brought in my daughter. She was four weeks early but healthy; I was beyond happy.

Those first few hours with her were glorious. I was still pleasantly numb from pain meds, and my daughter was still exhausted from coming into this world. My husband and I were in heaven. But later that night, I quickly learned that being a parent was going to be the toughest job I have ever had.

The truth is I had no clue about what qualifications were needed for this job. I just got hired. I then realized; I was not qualified. I just delivered a baby, and I was now christened a Mom. I signed a lifelong contract with no salary and a promise of some euphoric love that was supposed to make you not care about the lack of pay.

Eventually, the meds wore off, and the searing pain from the surgery ripped through my body. My daughter woke up with the biological need to feed and cried in hunger. My husband ate some bad cafeteria food and was getting sick in my hospital bathroom.

I laid there, waiting for this love that was supposed to propel me beyond my pain. I laid there waiting for these motherly instincts to kick in so I would know what to do and how to feed my child. I laid there waiting for a nurse or someone to come to save me, but no one came. It was just my brand-new daughter and me. This was by far my hardest first day on a job ever!