“Yes, Yes, it’s Decaf”
How to Maintain Our Coffee Connections
“Yes, yes, it’s decaf,” my godmother Eleni, one of my husband Ted’s older Greek Cypriot friends, exclaimed when she set coffee mugs and Greek walnut cake before us.
She had just cleared the remnants of her home-cooked chicken, potatoes, and Greek green beans (“Fasilaki”) — one of her traditional meals — from the table.
With an air of satisfaction, my husband Ted sipped the hot coffee, alternating coffee with morsels of cake.
The evening progressed with our friendly and animated exchanges as we focused on a myriad of topics: details of our lives, Kyria (Greek for Mrs.) Eleni’s latest jobs, and new tenants in her building since she was the property manager.
With affectionate goodbyes, we departed, headed home to watch the news, and then retired for the evening.
However, the story did not end there. Ted awoke multiple times during the night and given that he was a reasonable man, he could only attribute the poor quality of his sleep to the coffee.
In his brief investigative process, the next day he phoned Kyria Eleni and relayed that he had had difficulty sleeping the previous night. Then he plunged into the pivotal question: “Kyria Eleni, was last night’s coffee decaf?” to which she admitted with an air of defiance,
“Oh, it’s all the same! I can drink either one day or night!” to which Ted added, “You may be able to, but I can’t drink regular coffee after noon!”
From then on, she agreed to serve only decaf coffee to us in the evening, and we purchased her a tasty Peet’s coffee, decaf style.
From that day forward, there were no more restless nights attributed to caffeine, as served by Eleni.
As a family, we have many memories involving my Greek godmother, Kyria Eleni, who we have known only as a widow, within our family circle since 1990.
She had befriended my mother-in-law, Ioulia (Greek for Julia), while she was in America caring for our infant daughter Julia.
Their friendship grew through numerous Oakland Greek church events and senior activities.
I had agreed to become a Greek Orthodox, whose doctrines are similar to Roman Catholic (my previous faith).
Kyria Eleni became my godmother, and Ioulia became a friend’s godmother, who coincidentally lived in Kyria Eleni’s building and was well-known to her.
I was baptized in the Greek Orthodox church at the age of 43, even though I had been baptized at birth in the Catholic church.
We had many memorable associations, lunches, dinners, and churchgoings with these loving women.
We have discovered more connections between my mother-in-law and godmother in that they shared a best friend in Polis, Cyprus.
Ioulia and Eleni shared Sunday church liturgy, Wednesday senior center activities, and spontaneous lunches and dinners with each other and our family.
I found comfort in hearing them speak Greek together through the entirety of their visit, since my mother-in-law, Ioulia, had only Ted and one other friend with whom to speak Greek and only Greek.
Ted often quotes as he is drinking coffee, “Yes, yes it’s decaf,” in Kyria Eleni’s simple and to-the-point voice. To Ted and me, this quote of, “Yes, yes it’s decaf,” served to provide many cherished memories of Kyria Eleni.
She was simple, solid, unpretentious, and loving, which endeared me immediately to her, given my past lacking a warm maternal figure. She also solidified a connection to the Greek / Cypriot tradition and way of life.
Our hearts weighed heavy when we learned that Kyria Eleni succumbed to abdominal cancer after a 5-year battle. Much like with my mother-in-law, I felt her loss acutely as a loving maternal figure in my life.
Rather than just feeling the void or emptiness left by her death, I replay and visualize many of the most poignant moments of my life with her.
This coffee incident, countless dinners at her downtown Oakland apartment, Greek festivals, shopping excursions to Grocery Outlet, and of course liturgies on Sunday at Oakland’s Greek church.
I have welcomed Kyria Eleni into my tapestry of memories that I can conjure at a moment’s notice to comfort and revitalize me.
