Things people say to bring you down (And why you should ignore them)
Wether you are a solopreneur or a still a wantrepreneur, I can confidently assume that at some point in your journey you were faced by friends and family with some very discouraging (and sometimes hurtful) words. And if you are like I was, you probably took it to the heart and started to beat yourself down in your thoughts — “They are right. Who am I fooling? I don’t have what it takes to _________.”
Well, the first thing that I want to say is that you are not at all alone. In fact, you are far from it. Fear and insecurity kill more dreams than failure ever will! So don’t think less of yourself for feeling this way. The second thing I want to say is…
Internet police beware: I am no psychologist or a coach. or anything like that. All that I am going to say here is based solely in my own experience, and even though it might not be the same for you, I hope it brings you some insights and inspirations to try and figure things out your own way.
You don’t how life is like
“Son, you don’t know how life is. This is not going to work the way you think.” Those were my father’s words when I told him I had decided to drop out of Engineering school to study advertising and design. He said that it as not the right decision, and that I was too young and I did not know “how life works.”
Well, yeah, dad, of course. At what age did you realize you already knew everything about life? I know he meant well and I appreciate his effort to keep me safe, but this is such a stupid thing to say to someone who is just starting to find their way.
I mean, by “life” what he actually meant was the tiny fraction of the world he spent his life on, the tiny bit of knowledge he had access to, and the tiny amount of people he had met. None of this qualifies as “life” for at least 99% of the world’s population.
“Life” is different for every single one of us, the fact that he had his own experiences does not mean he knows what life is like everywhere for everyone all the time.
The illusion of thinking that the complex, ever changing spectrum of life can fit into a single person’s head is complete bullsh*t and you need to know that right now if you want to find your own way in life.
Remember: Nobody can ever know how life works, and it is pointless to think you’ll ever be able to, so don’t let that be a reason to stop you.
You are going to starve in that career
I think that one of the best arguments to beat this one down is probably Kylie Jenner. Think about it: She does not have a skill, a talent, a profession, an interesting story, she hasn’t helped anyone in any way, she is not even that pretty, she is a completely pointless human being, yet she is the youngest billionaire in the world. (yes, she was born into a rich family, true, but she makes a ton of money from her own brands nonetheless). If that doesn’t prove that money can come for anyone doing anything, I don’t know what else does.
Specially nowadays, we have a ton of opportunities to make a decent living doing what we love. You can be someone in the countryside of a traditionally rural state in an underdeveloped country and have great clients in New York, London, Paris, Rio or Rome. The only thing you need is to do is to successfully attract the right people for you. And you don’t have to be right next to them to do so (although it DOES help to be close).
Use the power of the internet! Blog, start an YouTube channel, write on Medium, Linkedin, or simply share you knowledge with people on Facebook groups, if your pvode value, eventually people will notice you, and they will trust you, and that is the perfect time to make friends and money from all around the world.
With the right connections, you can be a musician in Uruguay composing the soundtrack for a Hollywood movie, or a fashion designer in Tunisia working for that famous New York City stylist, or a philosopher anywhere simply sharing their thoughts to millions of people online. The business models of today allow for many different ways to earn cash, you just need to work on your connections and get good about your passion!
The chances of being successful are minimal
First thing you should know about this one is: Success is a different thing for everyone. While to me success is a small house with a garden by the Mediterranean Sea, to my 3rd grade math teacher it was to be an important CEO of a multinational brand. And quite frankly, that sounds like absolute hell to me.
So if success is this very subjective thing, how can someone ever come to you and say you will never be able to find it? The answer is simple: they don’t know what success mean to them.
And that is a shame, for if they never figure this out, they will their lives blindly chasing anything. And they will settle for anything. And then they will envy you for trying to find your own way all along.
What does success look like to you? Can you imagine it? Can you picture yourself in it? What is the plan to get there? When do you expect to reach it? Those 5 questions are all you need to ask yourself about success. The people trying to discourage you is just white noise. Ignore them. Ignore them so hard they will rethink their entire lives.
You know nothing about this. What were you thinking?
Ah yes, of course. The old “You don’t know first thing about _____” comment. This comes tipically from people who are either too lazy or tooafraid to learn new things.
Have you ever heard the expression “Hire attitude, teach skills” ? Well, it is how many companies nowadays guide their own HR policies. Brands are not looking for a ninja to work with them, they just want someone who will be excited and devoted to their cause, even if they have to train this person to have to the skills for the job. That is, of course, if you want to get a job in whatever industry you’re interested in.
If you want to be a solopreneur or have your own business, you can always enroll in a course, attend to workshops or simply ask someone to coach you. You will be amazed how easily you can learn something you are passionate about! And how difficult it is to perform the most simple tasks on something you absolutely hate.
Want to have your own pizzeria? Search YouTube for any piece of content on Pizza. Want to have your own clothing brand? Go learn about the life of Coco Chanel… Whatever it is, just go after it, knowlegde comes waaaaaaay easier if you love what you are doing. And practice comes even easier when you have the courage to ask experienced people to teach you. And they almost always do it!
In Conclusion
People who are always trying to discourage you do it because they too were discouraged before. Go easy on them, but try your best to prove them wrong. Who knows? Maybe you end up inspiring the people who tried to bring you down, and that would be such a beautiful way to influence them.
Do not fall into the limbo of great people who simply gave up their dreams. Go for it, don’t settle until you are satisfied. This is yor life, and there is absolutely nothing else you can do but seek your own way to be happy.
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