How A Hurricane Taught Me Selflessness
When a friend had her children stolen, I almost didn’t help.
My friend Ana who lives in Mexico had sent her kids to stay with her sister (who lives in Virginia), for what was supposed to be a one month vacation. But when it came time for her sister to send the kids back, she refused. Her sister never took them to the airport. Then she blocked Ana, as well as the rest of her family in Mexico, on Facebook.
Her sister wouldn’t respond to any calls or messages, and she had taken away the kids’ phones so they could no longer communicate with Ana. With her kids 1,800 miles away, in another country which had never allowed Ana to become a citizen no matter how hard she tried, Ana was beyond terrified. And Ana had learned that her sister had not only enrolled the kids in a public school, but also had sent a letter to the school’s social worker making false allegations against Ana.
In Ana’s frantic, worried mind, this social worker had the power of a judge presiding over a custody case. Ana’s messages on Facebook to me and our friend, Christy (who also lives in Virginia and had agreed to help), became increasingly desperate.
Do you think the social worker will take my kids and take us to court?
I’m so scared….
Ana needed my help, and I’ll never forgive myself for my initial response. I said, “Sorry, but I’m at my max right now. I wish I could help you but I’m literally sick with stress.”
I wasn’t lying about being at my max. If you follow my stories, you’d know I’ve had my fair share of tragedies lately. But still, looking back I don’t know how on earth I could’ve responded like that. My friend was about to lose her children, maybe forever, and I told her I couldn’t get involved. Thankfully, I changed my mind once she was on her way.
Ana, her parents, and her brother-in-law drove almost the entire way from Mexico to Virginia without stopping. With little money for hotels, gas, or food, they had to. Her plan was to try to get her kids from the bus stop before they were picked up for school, but she didn’t even know exactly where their bus stop was or what school they were going to.
I googled middle schools in the area, and sent her two links for the possibilites. She was so appreciative for the ten seconds I spent finding this information. Christy insisted multiple times to pay for a them to get a hotel room close to their bus stop, but Ana politely refused.
As Ana and her family got closer to Virginia, my boyfriend realized my house was much closer than Christy’s house and to the bus stop where Ana needed to be early the next morning. So around 9:30pm I sent her a message, Please just stay at my house.
Again, she was so thankful and just for having a friends’ house where they could crash for a few hours and get some sleep. But Ana worried about keeping me up late to wait for them.
Are you sure? I feel bad making you stay up so late. You must be sleepy.
These messages were coming from a girl who had been on the road 26 hours. And when I offered to go with her to the bus stop the next morning, she replied, “Would you have to drive a long way?”
Would I have to drive a long way? 35 minutes. 35 minutes is all (I’m crying writing all of this).
As it turned out, Ana missed the kids at the bus stop. But she went to the school, and both the principal and the guidance counselor knew what was going on and immediately called her kids to the office and released them to their mother.
The guidance counselor told Ana she was so glad Ana got there when she did. Her sister had already filed for custody and had Ana waited she might have found it very difficult to get her children back. The counselor’s exact words were, “I’m so happy you drove all this way to fight for your kids.”
Ana and her family returned to my house in an exhausted but happy flurry. Her kids were beaming, and her 12-year-old daughter was stuck to Ana’s side like glue. After Ana showered and the kids were settled in watching TV, we were sitting on my back porch chatting. We talked about the old days when Ana and her kids lived here, fond memories of drinking iced tea and watching the kids play.
And then, out of the blue, Ana looked embarrased, and with the utmost sincerity, she said to my boyfriend and me:
I’m so sorry I didn’t bring you anything. I should’ve brought you some Mexican candy or something, but I didn’t have time.
Ana, her parents, and her brother-in-law had left Mexico at 5am on the Monday Hurricane Harvey hit Texas. Their extended family had all either chipped in or borrowed money for them to make this trip. In all her time on the road when she was messaging me, she complained not once about the all the time in car, or being tired, or not having enough money. Instead, she apologized for keeping me up late one night and for not bringing me a gift from Mexico.
She later wrote on Facebook:
♡♡ Porque el amor de madre es mucho más fuerte que cualquier huracán ♡♡ gracias infinitas a mis herman@s y a mis padres por nunca dejarme sola.
(♡♡ Because the love of a mother is much stronger than any hurricane ♡♡ Infinite thanks to my sisters and parents for never abandoning me.)
Ana brought me so many gifts: a renewed spirit, a reminder of how fortunate I am to have be born a U.S. citizen with so many opportunities others only dream of, a reminder of what lengths good mothers will go to for their kids, and the importance of helping others even when you think you have nothing left to give.
Te amo, mi querida amiga.
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