Day 9 Sugano Sensei Remembrance: “Prayer is giving away ego.”

Brian Ericksen
Aug 9, 2017 · 4 min read

March 15, 2009. Lunch with Sensei on trip to NY for black belt class.

Brian Ericksen: “I have moved gradually from the time I was training and living in the dojo back to my Christian roots.” I do not say it but this started when I was an Uchideshi because of Sugano Sensei. Becoming an Uchideshi had been part of a search for something deeper after I began to have doubts and questions on the Christian faith of my upbringing. That struggle changed one day walking along 5th Avenue going to Central Park. In passing a cathedral there Sensei stopped and went in. To the my surprise Sensei knelt at the pew, bowed and then sat down. We sat there for some time. Sensei seemed to be praying. Sensei then again knelt, bowed and quietly exited.

I was a bit in shock. I asked Sensei if he was Christian. He was much amused. Shaking his head he laughed, “God is God, hmmmm…” As we walked up to and through Central Park, Sensei talked on making a spiritual path in life and Aikido. It was one of the many times I wish I had recorded exactly what he said as it was so profound. I have never forgotten the broad outlines though. He said that prayer was the highest understanding of ki. He said that if one does practice or breathing exercise that one can only understand ki inside. It only adds to ego and goes nowhere. If one is to decrease ego and understand ki one must pray. Prayer is energy that goes outside of the person toward God. In order to understand ki one must give it away. One must empty themselves and that comes through prayer. One needs to pray in order to clarify themselves and their practice.

I was so surprised at the entire conversation and kept it as a touch stone within me for many years. The conversation and the memory of that day at the cathedral in time lead me back to my Christian roots. “God is God!” allowed me to look at Christianity in a more expansive way than I had, allowing me to return to faith.

(This conversation took place about 1996 or so. Strangely enough when I asked Sensei something about conversation later, particularly about prayer, he looked at me and shook his head. “I never said that” he told me. I almost choked as it had been one of the most important conversations of my life. “But Sensei, you said…” He cut with his hand. “Never said anything like that.” The conversation was finished. Till he returned to some of these same points 10 years later here.)

I continued, “My Christian belief helps to make a foundation from which I define myself and find deeper meanings in life, Sensei. I see that Aikido has certain things that I find in my Christian understandings. Aikido is a force of love and understanding. I see Christianity as the same. Tenkan I think is similar to turning the other cheek. I am searching for a way to bring together my understandings. Do you see a compatibility?”

Sugano Sensei.

“O Sensei related to his gods. To the universe. It is wrong to relate this to Christianity. O Sensei described universal energy as love. Quite different than Christianity. For O Sensei god is creation which equals love. Every universal action= love. Shinto describes every action as based on love. Doesn’t have any relationship to person. The love is to gods. Thanks to his creators. Nothing dealing with people. O Sensei never talk about people. Related to Gods. Hopefully other people feel the same thing. If not, no harmony. However, O Sensei’s understanding not having to do with human relationships.”

I struggled to understand what he had just told me as I wrote it down. To get him to say more I provocatively asked him, “If it is not about personal relationships then why not use Aikido to beat up people? Why should we be considerate to others?”

Sugano Sensei.

“Because Aikido is to make unity with God. Must detach from the martial in order to make unity. The problem is the way. People are alway s thinking different things. Always interpreting from ourselves”

BE: I don’t understand. I cannot leave myself. I cannot walk away from my body or my mind or my ego. They are me. How am I not to interpret from myself?”

Sugano Sensei.

“If you focus on the training you will understand. Not martial training, just training. You must be humble and not fill yourself with false ego about martial training.”

BE: “This false ego is this why it is bad to beat up on other students?”

Sugano Sensei.

“Don’t do that!! Aikido teaches to get into good position. Technique must be functional but not martial. It is not to abuse people. If you are in good position you must take care. Continuous study involves layer on layer of study, each layer so different. This is the best way to study. Study technique, functionality. Study spirituality.”

BE: “What is the way that we should approach spiritual study in Aikido?”

Sugano Sensei.

“Just basic meditation. Insight meditation. Meditation builds self-understanding. Prayer. In meditation try to understand self. In prayer try to communicate with God. That is mostly prayer. Meditation has problem of ego. Meditation gives understanding but increases ego. Prayer is giving away ego. Prayer makes humble. Once achieve a certain level though cannot go more as prayer is about giving away. Not best solution. Have to do practice, meditation, prayer. Together they increase understanding, make humble and increase layer on layer.”

Heaven and Earth Aikido

USAF aikido dojo located in Herdon, VA, USA

Brian Ericksen

Written by

Dad, Aikidoka, Veteran.

Heaven and Earth Aikido

USAF aikido dojo located in Herdon, VA, USA

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