2017 Week 2 Power Rankings
This was a pretty ugly week of football action. It’s never a good idea to overreact to a single week, much less the first week, of NFL action. I tried not to do that, but there was some movement.
THE HAVE NOT TIER
12 — Dalvin & The Chipmunks (1–0, Even)
Outscoring an Ajayi and Parker-less Abaum team isn’t exactly worthy of a bump in the rankings. Beating Billy? We’re definitely getting closer to deserving a bump.
For the most part, this team was what we expected from them in Week 1. Perhaps they were even worse, I guess that depends on what your expectations of Paul Perkins were heading into the season. Dalvin Cook looked legit, so you’ve got that going for you. You won’t always be playing Billy, so don’t get too used to the W.
Sarlo’s Take (12) — Ian is a lot closer to moving up, something I honestly didn’t expect to happen this season. Hooper won’t always put up 25 points, but Henry should see more carries looking like the best back in Tennessee to balance it out. I suspect 130–140 is this team’s ceiling, but that could be more than enough to win on down weeks.
11 — Mike and Roy’s Dynasty (0–1, E)
This team is going to bad. But they won’t be that bad every week. Ajayi and Parker should be close to 30 more points and there’s a little more upside with some of his other players as well.
Sarlo’s Take (11) —Mike could easily be 12th, and just might be sooner than later if he has to keep starting Perriman and Treadwell.
10 — The Drama Queens (0–1, -1)
Losing to Ian. Ouch. Over the course of a season, we’re probably going to see regression from Tyreek Hill and Jesse James and some positive regression for Alshon Jeffrey and Kelvin Benjamin. The end result will likely be the same, especially with Russel Wilson continuing to play out his prime behind a horrendous offensive line.
Sarlo’s Take (10) — Still no running backs and his WRs-not-named-Hill grossly underperformed. I suspect his team will positively regress next week, but it’s hard to see the playoffs with Hill and West as the RBs.
9— Hooked on a Thielen (0–1, +1)
There were a lot of match ups BPou would’ve have won this week, but instead he went up against the Kareem Cheeses. Such is life in the HDL. The Great White Hype, Adam Thielen was definitely the biggest bright spot. After being left on Brett’s bench during the championship last year, Thielen continued his high scoring performance.
There were some disappointing performances as well, but it was Martavis Bryant’s first real action in two years and Mike Wallace’s quarterback, who was 2nd in pass attempt last year, threw less than 20 times on Sunday. There could be brighter days ahead after all.
Sarlo’s Take (9) — Brett’s team was exactly what I expected, and Brett could easily end up a playoff team (again). Guys like Bryant, Wallace, and Matthews are good bets for better weeks moving forward, which would put him in that 150–170 range playoff teams should put up this year.
8 — The Kareem Cheeses (1–0, +2)
Big score for head out of the gates. Kareem Hunt out there settin’ records and beating the Pats will do that for ya. Hunt looks like the real deal, but 40 point weeks don’t happen every week regardless of who you are.
Head and his previous co-owner, Billy, are the Bizarro versions of one another. The Kareem Cheeses RB corp is legit, but it’s gonna be painful to trot out those WR each week. There was thought to moving them up a tier, but I still don’t think he’s a legitimate threat to push for the playoffs, but he could annoy some of the teams who are making a push.
Sarlo’s Take (8) —Hunt had a big week, but before we go crazy crowning him the rookie MVP lets remember Ware put up 35 points last week in Week 1. Head still has consistency throughout his roster, so while I don’t expect many more 190+ point performances, week-to-week 160+ scores are well within the cards, making the wildcard chase more competitive this year than its been in a while.
THE WHAT DO WE HAVE TIER
7 — VIVA LA FRANCE (0–1, -2)
Sarlo said it best himself, Luck being out probably hurts him more than it hurts Troy. I’ve seen the light and moved him down appropriately. Hilton and Moncrief are severely limited without Luck and now Allen Robsinon is out for the year.
Getting his quarterback for 16 straight weeks could be helpful, assuming Winston survives, and he’ll have enough good weeks that he’s still in the conversation. I am, however liking his chances less and less.
Sarlo’s Take (7) — Not much to say here other than this team could easily continue downward trending. Already down two players on the season, missing Andrew Luck makes what was once a roster full of high upside receivers look like an inconsistent, unpredictable mess.
6 — Mealey’s Tac-over (0–1, E)
Carson Palmer looks bad. Andrew Luck still a few weeks out. Is it Tyrod time?
He also lost Danny Woodhead and had some performances that may have exposed a shallow WR corp. The good news is Landry is back this week and Doug Marrone seems to have meant it when he said he wished he could run it every play. The Jags loss of Allen Robinson should do nothing but help solidify Fournette’s workload.
If Troy can weather the storm until Luck comes back he could still be playing in week 14.
Sarlo’s Take (6) — This team is in trouble. Palmer looks bad, Woodhead could miss a lot of time, Marshall looks washed up, Torrey Smith is going to be inconsistent-at-best as a fantasy start. LF is as advertised, but outside of that this team looks like one that will struggle to make the playoffs.
5 — MEHrino’s MEHn (1–0, +2)
Of the three teams in this tier, Marino’s team had the best performance and outside of Matthew Stafford none of his players had especially good games. Several solid performances, but no real standouts. The lose of Kevin White hurts more because Marino dealt a first this off-season for him, but the impact to his actual lineup is likely minimal.
If this week was a baseline, MEHrino’s MEHn could surprise a few people this year.
Sarlo’s Take (5) — I suspect Marino’s rank to fluctuate weekly based on overreactions to his volatile scores, and Week 1 is no different. Is lacking serious depth and needs Hurns to step up with Robinson out.
THE HAVES TIER
4. Asshat Cowboys (0–1, E)
From my Hot Cakes series, here’s what I had to say about Calhoun:
The Asshat Cowboys are about two players deep. Granted, those two players are really good. Like top 12–15 good. But beyond Odell Beckham and AJ Green is there anyone on his roster that’s really scary?
Well one of those two players was out this week and they weren’t particularly scary. Hot cakes aside, there are likely brighter days in Calhoun’s future. But for his sake, I hope he doesn’t have to start his fourth WR ever again. It’s ugly after Decker.
Sarlo’s Take (4) —The most vulnerable looking of the “top” teams. Even with OBJ back they’re going to have a tough time with depth, and he can’t be happy about some of the guys he has to start weekly if he has championship aspirations.
3. Hilary Clinton’s Email (1–0, -1)
Things are tense within Hilary Clinton’s Email. David Johnson’s prognosis is somewhere between finishing week 1 with a boo-boo and being in critical condition. Despite the varied reports, the outlook doesn’t look good.
Outside of the recently crowned king — Stefon Diggs — the “deepest. ever.” WR corp didn’t look particularly special. The running backs behind Bell and DJ also didn’t impress too much. There’s definitely still talent on the roster, but the loss of last years top fantasy performer is enough to knock the reigning champ down a peg.
Sarlo’s Take (3) — I wrote pretty extensively about the weakness in this team’s strategy — rely on 25+ weekly scores out of QB/RB/RB, and plug in WR2’s and WR3s to fill out the scores. Without David Johnson this strategy falls apart and the team suddenly looks mortal.
2. Uhhh WATT! YEEAAHH! (1–0, +1)
This is as much about Cleve’s lineup coming into the year as it is Hallahan’s loss of David Johnson. Week 1 was a bunch of underwhelming, if not disappointing, performances from many of the big names on Cleve’s roster. Luckily for him, it didn’t much matter because Brian Hoyer. Oh, and Antonio Brown is still a monster.
With the Bradonking yet to kick into regular season mode, this team has a big ceiling and should be there battling until the end.
Sarlo’s Take (2) — I have a sneaking suspicion this could be Cleve’s lowest score of the season.
- GUTTER SLUGS (1–0, E)
#1 in your power rankings, unranked in your hearts it’s Dave Falcone and Christ Black! After being the consensus #1 for much of the off-season Falcone’s squad left little doubt by pacing the league in points. Zeke Elliott looks primed to play all 16 and Mike Evans hasn’t even had a chance to play football yet. This is the team to beat until proven otherwise.
Sarlo’s Take (1) — I still think this team is going to struggle getting their best players any given week into their starting lineup, but I’m also starting to think it doesn’t matter.
