Confrontations are scary business. I think I’d rather slay a dragon, — 🎶 ‘cause I slay. I slay. I slay. Ok, ladies now let’s get in formation. 🎶 – oops sorry, I got a bit carried away…
What I’m saying is, confrontations scare the living chorizo outta me!
Because you have to talk to another human being that’s why! No, I’m joking but confrontations are scary because they are always about a problem. For instance my confrontation was about leaving my au pair host family because I didn’t feel like I was being treated right. So I had to have a conversation with my host parents about me leaving their family. As I had expected it, the confrontation went terribly wrong! My host mother blamed everything on me, she belittled me and I felt awful. My eyes actually started to water and I begged her to stop making me feel worst than I already felt but she was mean to me so she couldn’t care less about my feelings…
The truth is, I thought about not having the confrontation. I thought about staying with them just to make THEM happy, just so that THEY wouldn’t be upset with me. But what good would that make? I would have ended up miserable with them. That is not a way to live life! That is not a way to live your au pair experience (which is a wonderful experience that I recommend vividly, provided you LOVE children and you find the right family!)
So before I could talk myself out of having this confrontation, I confidently walked downstairs to our living room to announce them that I would be leaving at the end of January. After hours of me practically crying in the darkness of my room and hesitating one thousand times in front of the living room door, I finally opened that door and said what I had to say. It wasn’t easy and in all honesty, I forgot bits of my pre-prepared speech but I kind of got my point across (before being rudely interupted).
All that to tell you that “I SURVIVED” — I’m a survivor, I’m not gon’ give up! Imma survive! Keep on surviving! 🎶 — Dang it Beyoncé, stop it already!
I was extremely scared of having this confrontation and unfortunately for me it went terribly TERRIBLY wrong BUT I had to do it for my own good! I could not just say nothing and pretend like I was happy. I had to let them know how I felt.
Not all confrontations go badly. Sometimes you can get lucky and the other person might surprise you and actually apologize or change or something along those lines. But I am not writting this blog to give you false hope and to reassure you that the confrontation will 100% go well. I am sharing my worst confrontation with you, so that you can see that it is best to have the confrontation even if you don’t want to or even if it goes badly. I want you to take me as an example next time you need to confront someone. I know that you will be scared and I know that you will probably try to convince yourself that you don’t really have to confront this person but if you know deep inside of you that something is not right then you know that you HAVE to tell the other person involved. It won’t do you any good to just keep it all to yourself and let the other person off the hook just casually living their life as if nothing happened!
Please, DO NOT LET YOUR FEAR WIN!
You CAN do it! And you WILL do it!
I really hope that everything turns out well for you. One thing that I know for sure is that after having the confrontation, everything will be alright! You will find a better situation, you will feel happy and free and you won’t have to worry about the problem anymore! It is what is best for you, so for your own sake please don’t shy away from a confrontation!
I also made a video on my youtube channel with 3 tips of things to do before a confrontation so you might want to check that out too! ☺︎
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