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5 of the Most Underrated Signs of Messy Relationships

John Emmanuel
Hello, Love
Published in
6 min readMay 31, 2022

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How often do you find yourself in a relationship where you loved fiercely and never relented in putting in every possible effort you could just to make the relationship work, only to find yourself in a never-ending string of messy and mediocre situations?

If "very often" is your answer to the above question, likely, you've countlessly had the following thoughts:

Why do my relationships usually end up being so tangled? Or, What am I doing wrong? Do I have such bad luck in love?

While it's natural for a relationship to be challenging because even in the very best relationships things can go awry at times, when the stress in a relationship reaches a certain threshold, it can start to have detrimental effects on every aspect of your life.

But the truth is, sometimes, the reason why a lot of people always end up wondering what they could have possibly been doing wrong that makes their relationships as messy as hell is that they're just putting up behaviors that are really nothing more than a lack of love for themselves and a lack of knowledge of their self-worth and value. Which makes their partners treat them overly poorly.

Well, with that being said, here are 5 of the most underrated mistakes you'll be making if you're in a messy relationship. And if one, few, or all of the following signs define your relationship, it's crystal clear that your relationship is a messy one.

1. You're constantly being their cheerleader

Being your partner's biggest cheerleader and strong support system is, without a doubt, one of the keys to a strong, healthy relationship.

Because there is nothing more satisfying than being in a relationship in which both partners are each other's best cheerleaders as they make themselves hopeful of a calm future even amid a storm. Or a relationship in which both partners financially, logistically, and emotionally support one another.

But the thing is, spending all of your energy on trying to cheer your partner up when your partner is not making an effort to motivate themselves, or even better, making an effort to cheer you or motivate you, is not only a waste of…

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John Emmanuel
Hello, Love

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