Do Average Looking Guys Have a Shot with Women?

Liliana Andrino
Hello, Love
Published in
3 min readNov 22, 2023


An average looking guy looking away
As an average looking guy, do you think you have a shot with women? Sorry, but you don’t unless you make certain changes. | Photo by jaikishan patel on Unsplash

Do you think you got a shot with her?

With your baggy loose-end jeans and bland personality. Basic.

The truth stings, so I’m just going to say it straight. In turn, you better listen with an open mind.

Average is the epitome of being boring. Of course, you have little to no chance with the girl of your dreams.

But not everything is set in stone. There is hope for average looking guys. Small changes here and there can be improvements for the likes of you.

Physical appearance

Average looking guys do not stand out. They are not ugly by any means, but they are also not the type that would wow people.

I might sound shallow, but physical appearance plays a significant role in the dating scene. If it were you, would you go out with a woman who does not match your preference? Most likely not.

Similarly, women are attracted to guys with perfect faces and ungodly heights with muscular build. However, you’re not a Greek god, you’re built differently. So what happens then?

Well, don’t be discouraged; looks can be subjective.

Moreover, physical appearance is not just about your body — it’s also about how you care for yourself. So, play the cards you are dealt with.

Groom and style are the only things you can physically manipulate, but they can go a long way.

Putting extra effort into finding a style that fits you gives you personality. However, don’t overdo it, or you might look unlikeable.

Personality check

Although your physical appearance can earn you a good first impression on women, it is your personality that sticks.

Being tall, fashionable, and handsome are all great. But even with all the attractive physical traits, it won’t matter if nobody can stand talking with you.

Here are some characteristics to have to get you started:

  • Humor
  • Confidence
  • Kindness
  • Loyalty
  • Intelligence
  • Ambition

If you already possess these traits, then great! Just remember, characteristics tend to fall off over time. In other words, having these traits does not mean they will last, especially if not properly developed. Consistency is key.

Being the ideal man

For a man to stand out, he does not only need to pay attention to his looks or personality. How he deals with life also matters.

Average looking guys or “average Joes” often barely live their lives, much less shape the lives of people around them. As a result, they are not the men we desire.

Even though regular guys have many opinions about themselves and proclaim change, they rarely act on them. They just let life happen, taking blows and never returning one.

Average Joes usually operate on a “what’s in it for me” principle, unable to take the initiative — selfish.

Moreover, when cornered, their fight or flight response kicks in. Instead of standing up and choosing to fight back, they often choose the latter.

Granted, some can change. However, it all boils down to motive, whether in his pursuit of power, profession, or women.

What separates an average guy from an ideal man is his ability to convey his emotions calmly, take responsibility for his actions, and put his ego aside.

Changes can be hard but doable. Do you have what it takes to be the ideal man, or do you want to remain the average looking guy who has no shot with women?



Liliana Andrino
Hello, Love

Professional Dating Coach, Writer, and Mentor for I am an advocate for love that goes beyond borders.