Did I Have to Leave My Partner to Like Him Again?
The perks of breaking up.
I was with my former partner for 23 years. It was a slog. Like the sound of fingernails scraping on a blackboard. Like sandpaper on my heart.
The years piled up so many violations, unacceptable and often immoral behaviors, and multiple addictions that I was left not liking him, not respecting him, and fairly contemptuous of him.
Think white male privilege and extreme cheapness, meets sugar, porn, prostitute and pot addiction. Think disengaged stoned dude who wouldn’t work or take care of the kids or lift a finger to help out at home.
But ‘nough of that.
Because now I like him again.
Because I don’t have to be with him.
I am free to just enjoy the way our long history together binds us.
It is him that I still want first and foremost to talk to when one of our young adult kids is having a tough time.
He is kinda fun to talk with. I miss that part of living with him. The daily companionship of conversation.
He always wanted to be around me. He just didn’t know how to be loving and cherishing and giving. He was too consumed with getting for himself.
