Fellas, This Is What Ladies Do (And Don’t) Want to See in Your Dating Profile.
Dating apps force us to boil our existence into just a few words and photos in hopes of finding love, or whatever. What are some things that work?
Ah, online dating. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and countless other dating apps force us to boil our existence into just a few words and photos in hopes of finding love, or whatever. And while you may think you’re putting your best foot forward, potential matches may disagree. But why?
Dating coach and founder of Good Gentleman, Ruby Le, is an expert in love. She recently joined me as I swiped through Tinder on Facebook Live (click here to watch) and – based on the profiles we encountered – Ruby has some advice for the men-seeking-women of the world.
Regarding your photos…
- If your profile only has 1–3 photos, there’s a solid chance you’ll be swiped to the left. Post at least 5 photos and don’t be afraid to use the max amount (on Tinder that’s 9 pics).
- Don’t use your photo real estate to post memes, landscapes, or cars. We want to see YOU. Plus, if you have 4 photos of your car, know that you’re going to match with people who probably only care about the car. Is that the type of person you’re looking for?
- On a related note, we LOVE pics with you and your dogs, cats, etc. Furry friends are fantastic. But don’t post photos of JUST the pet.
If you post too many photos of the dog itself and you’re never in it, it’s always a little sketchy. — Ruby
- No gym selfies, please! Ruby says, “If you have a good body there’s a way to show that in a more tasteful way.”
- No blurry photos, guys! Welcome to 2020 where anyone can snap a decent photo. Remember, self-timers are a thing!
- We don’t want to see photos of you with other girls. Unless it’s a relative. Moms are great. Your ex-girlfriend isn’t.
- Your first photo should NOT be a group photo – consider yourself automatically swiped left; we don’t want to decipher which one you are!
- On that note, group photos are great but should be used sparingly.
- Smile, smile, smile! And no sunglasses.
- Use a variety of photos! And be true to YOU. Don’t post photos you think we want to see. If you’re silly, outdoorsy, musical, etc., use photos that depict whatever you’re into!
Regarding your bio…
If you don’t have a bio, you better have really good photos.–Ruby
- You should include a bio, even if it’s just a few lines. In fact, we prefer it to be short and sweet. If you write a paragraph, we’re probably not going to read it. #thankunext
- Cool it with the emojis. Seriously. Use your WORDS.
- Please don’t write this: “I never know what to say in these things…so, I don’t know? Just ask!” Yikes! This line shows a total lack of confidence – EVERYONE has a personality and something to share. We don’t want to pull teeth when it comes to getting to know you.
- If you’re struggling to write a bio, Ruby suggests thinking about the top three traits that really matter to you as a person. What do you seek in a partner? What do your friends say about you?
- Don’t be negative in your bio! “If you don’t like puppies and popcorn, swipe left.” Yikes! I mean, I’d be skeptical of someone who didn’t like puppies too, but you shouldn’t set parameters like this in your bio.
TL;DR
Be true to yourself. That may mean ditching all of the above advice and going with your gut. That’s cool. Just don’t try and be someone you’re not on a dating app. And if you’re still unsure why you’re not getting matches or you don’t know how to revamp your profile, reach out to the experts: @rubyloveadvice and @charmed.app.
We love love and want to help you find it!