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How to Meet Women Without Being a Sleazy Pick Up Artist

Be more confident and less needy.

Ayodeji Awosika
Hello, Love
Published in
9 min readNov 20, 2021

“You should read this book.”

I was in college at the time. One thing about being in college is that you’re really horny all the time. My horny friend gave me this book to read and my horny ass read the book.

This book was called The Game. A journalist named Neil Strauss went uncover to unearth the hidden secrets of the pick-up artists: men who practice techniques to get more women to sleep with them.

Sounds pretty sleazy, huh?

Using tricks to get women to sleep with you isn’t a viable long-term strategy for a healthy dating life. So why do so many men turn to it?

The reason why The Game has sold millions of copies and why there’s a proliferation of dating advice for men is simple: a lot of guys struggle with confidence when it comes to dating.

And as much as the book had some truly tacky advice, there are insights from it that are genuinely helpful — the vanilla stuff about generally being more confident.

Are some guys just trying to get some ass? Absolutely, I was back in university won’t lie, but underneath the sleaze and the gimmicks, dating advice for men has helped them become more confident.

A lot of guys who turn to pick-up aren’t looking to sleep with a bunch of women. They just want to get a date, a girlfriend, even a wife. A lot of pick-up advice is just self-improvement in disguise.

They turn to pick-up because they don’t see a better alternative. Mainstream advice sucks and ignores dynamics that do exist between men and women. A guy struggling with women doesn’t want to keep hearing glib advice like ‘be yourself!’

And it’s not as if a guy is just going to come out in the open and admit he struggles with dating, so he’ll turn to something like a book he doesn’t want anyone to know he’s reading.

There’s room for dating advice that’s respectful of women and doesn’t shy away from certain truths about dating either.

Let’s give it a shot.

There’s Only One Piece of Dating Advice Men Really Need

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Hello, Love
Hello, Love
Ayodeji Awosika
Ayodeji Awosika

Written by Ayodeji Awosika

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