Lessons Learned From Being Married at 23
“A young love that could last forever.”
We all dream of meeting “The One” but what does that really mean? I think we all know what we want in life or at least have an idea of what interests us the most.
When my husband and I met he was 24 and I was 18, you are already thinking WOW that's an age difference right? Well, does age really matter nowadays? We met for the first time at a karaoke church-related fundraiser. Little did I know he was going to be the one for me, that I would fall in love and marry and be with forever. Sounds cliche, but here I’m a few years later “The Married Life” let me tell you what I have learned so far.
Don't Stress
When I say don't stress, I mean it. No one is perfect, and it’s ok to make mistakes that’s how we learn from them and perfect them with time. Many may think 23 is a young age but is it really? I don't think so, I know it sounds old-fashion in today's culture, but we decided and knew it was the best time to say I DO for a lifetime. At first, I would stress because I would say to myself: “Maybe I’m too young to get married?, or I don't know how to cook, when is it ok to start a family?”- etc. Those things would stress me out so much. But I learned that with the time or just taking those baby steps and learning from each other the stressing would slow down and stop. Stress is not good for anyone's health. We’re only human and being young is an advantage to continue to learn from it.
Commitment
For some reason I find this one to be the hardest for many nowadays. I feel like in today's society people are no longer trying to say committed at all. It must be fear of some sort or just being able to walk away from the relationship whenever they want. If they see it doesn't work out they leave, or just don't want to be committed at all.
However, if you ask any madly in-love couples about how important being committed is in a relationship and what that means to them, I’m sure they will respond that its the “key to a healthy marriage or relationship.”
When you go to a wedding ceremony and you hear either the priest or the couple say their vows that they are promising that commitment to each other on that special day its because they are more than ready to commit. No matter in sickness or health, or for better or worse you will always be by their side. Such powerful words that mean so much in a short sentence. I learned that being committed makes the relationship stronger and being that rock for one other. Because you know that that person is there by your side no matter what the circumstance may be. It's always a friendly reminder to look back on that special day and reminds you of what you said in your vows.
Effort
You can be committed as I mentioned, but will you have the effort to make the relationship stronger than ever? This is something I have learned along the way with time and still learning from it. That effort is how to make the relationship that could last a lifetime if you really wanted it to or at least try.
Making an effort, taking a risk, or a chance for that other person you love and means the world to you is a big deal. When making any type of effort don't worry if it's not perfect there will be times where it could be a failure, but times when you get them right this how we learn from them. But those moments that happen when they just simply fall into a place is where you will experience what real love looks like.
Don't worry there will be ups and downs throughout the way and that's normal. Love is a powerful word with so much meaning behind it and can be described and expressed in many ways. Everyone has there own definition of love. If you love with passion, with true feelings, and understanding one another this is the effort you are showing to each other. This is what I learned and I know sometimes it's not perfect, but your other half will know if the effort is really there.
Again, married at 23 was the best decision I made, I didn't feel I was “too young.” You never stop learning, every day is different with more ways to learn and to understand each other.
My dad always told me: “You can say you know that person well, but you never stop learning about each other, always something new and different, it never ends.”
“A young me, a young love that can last forever.”
— Lessons I learned at 23 and still learning every day.
