Marriage Shouldn’t Require Us to Sell Our Souls
But when an engagement ring goes on our finger all bets are off.
Years ago, I was talking to an old friend of mine. He was one of the first people amongst us to get divorced. I felt sad for him. Until he told me something.
“Are you doing okay?” I ask.
“I’m okay,” he says. “I knew when I was walking down that aisle I was making a mistake.”
“Really?” I say.
“Yes,” he says. “It became a runaway train that I couldn’t get off of. She had suffered some loss in her life. I felt like I couldn’t do it to her at that moment. I didn’t want to hurt her.”
Herein lies the absurdity of a formal commitment.
The moment a ring goes on a finger all bets are off.
We believe we aren’t allowed to doubt ourselves and this promise.
Even if we do have doubts. Even if we do regret what seems like an impossible regret. Even if we decide we feel pressured to make a commitment.
Marriage shouldn’t require us to sell our souls.
Before or after the vow.
We shouldn’t remain with someone because of two words.
