What It Means to Be “Paperclipped” and Why I’ll Never Fall for It Again
I won’t let myself be used anymore.
I’ve been paperclipped at least four times.
I think one of the most problematic parts is how good it feels, at least at first. It made me feel hopeful, special and worthy.
Looking back, though, the fact that paperclipping made me feel those ways shows just how insecure and unworthy I felt. It shows my lack of respect for myself and how badly I wanted a relationship.
“Paperclipping” is when an ex comes back into your life for no reason other than to feel better about themselves. They don’t want to be with you and they don’t mean the kind words they say; they only want to use you to feel confident and likable when they’re otherwise feeling insecure.
Like “Clippy,” the little paperclip with eyes that used to pop up on Microsoft Word, their presence is unsupportive and irritating.
According to a clinical psychologist, paperclipping has existed for longer than the term has, and it’s a way for people to use inauthentic, occasional connection and others’s emotions to increase feelings of self-esteem.
I was paperclipped around three or four years ago by a guy I was essentially in love with, despite the fact I hadn’t know…
