Letting Go: Part 1 — Black vomit

Overnight Robert threw up black vomit at 3 am and 5 am. I learned about this when I arrived to visit him today. Elysia said they were just about to call me. Black vomit equals blood. I felt my stomach drop and willed myself to deal with what was in front of me and not jump ahead to a feared, but not yet realized catastrophe.

The meaning of black vomit

Black vomit is made up of dry blood mixed with stomach acid. Fresh blood is red, dried blood is black or brown. Blood in the stomach can come from the esophagus, the stomach itself, or the duodenum (the small intestine). Bleeding in the gastrointestinal (GI) tract can stem from various underlying conditions, but the most common are gastric ulcers or gastritis (inflammation of the stomach lining). These irritations can be caused by bacteria or overuse of NSAIDS like ibuprofen. Robert doesn’t take any NSAIDS, but it is possible that another of his medications is causing GI irritation.

How are you feeling today?

Robert was sitting in the living room in his usual recliner with a fleece draped across his body, his hair stringy and matted to his forehead. The soft, sheer curtains were closed across the bay windows at the front of the house, sending filtered light into the room. Robert was napping. He seemed comfortable with his head…