Searching for a better home for my husband
In my last story, I shared how my son’s visit home rocked my world. Seeing my husband’s memory care home from a visitor's perspective made me realize how desperately he needed to be moved. This is a continuation of that story…
Jackson flew back to Chicago after a five-day trip home. Robert didn’t understand why his son wasn’t around anymore. I visited Robert at Daylight Senior Living and Memory Care every other day and gently reminded him each time that Jackson was in a graduate nursing program in Chicago.
“He lives in Chicago now.”
Robert was always surprised by the news. “Really? Chicago? It’s cold there.”
“Yes, it is. Jackson is doing well in school. He has just a year to go in his program. He’ll be working as a nurse soon.”
“Jackson is really smart!” And then, in a quasi-nonsequitur, “Maddie is a nurse.” Maddie is our daughter.
(Robert was diagnosed with dementia three months after we dropped Jackson off at college in Illinois. The separation has probably been hardest on Jackson. He’s torn between the desire to be with his father as his disease progresses and the intense, entirely appropriate pull to grow into adulthood. When we have some greater distance from all this, I’ll talk with Jackson about his experience. The subject is too painful…
