Choose Yourself
I’ve reframed rejection and saying no to a casual relationship.
I was talking to a girlfriend of mine about how I feel rejected when I’m propositioned for a casual arrangement. I feel disrespected and I take that shit personally. All the situations I’ve been in have sucked. Honestly, the men who ask for that, all have several characteristics in common.
I went on to her about how much that particular rejection sucks. I don’t like feeling like I’m being used for sex. It’s not the best feeling when the dude I like doesn’t want other people to know that he’s involved with me. I hate being in that position. It’s not my idea of fun. Then she said this,
“I don’t think you’re being rejected. You’re saying no to what you don’t want.”
Sure, one could argue that I’ve never truly been rejected. Despite how great I may seem to a dude, for whatever reason, he doesn’t want to date me properly. He’s always willing to, “hang out.” For me, that’s not enough. I want more. I think I deserve more as well. I actually feel as though I’m above being a casual gal. No shade to those who are, but I don’t want that to be my entire dating life story. So I take being good enough to sleep with, but not good enough to be involved with emotionally, as a rejection. You and I both…
