Can You Truly Give Someone All of You After Being Hurt?
He Said: Honestly, I think the answer is… Yes. But the more important question is… HOW do you give someone your all after being hurt? All of us have been hurt some how some way, but when do we learn how to deal with what has hurt us in the past? I have a few suggestions that have worked for others that I’d like to share with you.
The very first this is taking accountability of the situation. I know, he cheated. She was a horrible person. I get it. But at the end of the day even if you were deceived, you must still acknowledge where you turned left instead of right to end up where you are. So trace back your own steps to find out the decision that you’ve made in the past.
Now once you’ve figured out what part you’ve played in this situation, think about what you could’ve done differently. Really get in depth with it. Not just “well dealing with him/her was a bad decision.” Think about the signs you were shown in the beginning that you overlooked. So now that you have a grasp on what happened and what part you’ve played in it you can begin to release the hold these situations have over you mentally, spiritually & emotionally.
Lastly, you have to understand & accept two things.
- You have ZERO control over what other people say, think or do.
- What’s done is already done. There’s no need to drag your past into your present. You cannot let something that isn’t even currently happening anymore to have such a strong presence in your life. Let it go.
Of course there are plenty of other things you can incorporate into your life to learn and heal from hurtful and stressful situations. Stay tuned to our blog for more and more ways to let that hurt go!
She said: I think it’s definitely possible for someone to open up his/her heart to love or a relationship after being hurt. But it takes time to heal…and that can take days, months or even years. It ain’t easy to open yourself up to another person after you have been hurt.
Yes, when it first happens anger can be the strongest emotion you feel…Don’t linger in it…Don’t try to pay that person back for hurting you…
Don’t blame one person for the end of a relationship. We both played our parts in the unraveling of this thing…some of us may have played a bigger part by being a cheater, liar, user, distant, afraid, unavailable, uncaring or unsupportive.
You’ll need to take a break from dating after you been hurt so you can HEAL…if you move on too fast than all that anger, rage, disappointment and hurt is transferred into you new relationship.
Deal with your unhealthy relationship patterns, such as dating the same type of person, recreating the relationship of your parents or becoming intimate with him/her too soon.
Reflect on what could you have done differently and what is it you really want in your next relationship.
So the next time you give your ALL you are confident that you are giving your love and attention to the right person.