How to Be Happy for a Friend When You’re Actually Jealous
Use your jealousy for good, not evil.
While some people say that feeling jealous about a friend’s success is common, it can also be detrimental, depending on how you act toward each other. Yes, some friendly competition can be healthy, but I think it depends on the people involved.
Let’s say you and a friend both apply for the same scholarship. You both really need it — tuition for this grad school program is expensive — and scholarships are being given out to several applicants. You get it; your friend doesn’t. Or vice-versa.
If you were the one to not get it, wouldn’t you still be happy for your friend? I’d be thrilled for them. In fact, a friend of mine just applied for a loan and encouraged me to apply even though I had no intention of doing so; I was not approved whereas she was … for $14,000. I was ecstatic for her, not jealous or resentful. Plus, remember, I’d hesitated applying in the first place, as I knew I didn’t meet all the loan qualifications, so not getting it was fine with me.
When competition comes up between you and a friend — whether it’s over a scholarship, loan, work, or something else — here are some things to keep in mind so that the “healthy competition” doesn’t turn unhealthy.
