#NaNoWriMo 2017: Day Twenty-Four
High Dependency
The previous chapters can be found here: https://medium.com/high-dependency
Chapter Twenty-Four
Mr. and Mrs. Firman sat in their house at the dining table having a tense discussion. Cosmo was asleep.
“We’ve got to talk about this boy, Horace” said Mrs. Firman.
“What about him?” asked Mr. Firman.
“He’s got to start school in September” she replied.
“No he doesn’t. I thought we’d agreed that we were going to home school him”
“I’m having second thoughts about that” said Mrs. Firman.
“Well it’s a bit late now”
“Hardly. It’s only April. There’s plenty of time to find him a primary school place. The local authority are obliged to take him”
“This isn’t what we talked about, dear” said Mr. Firman.
“No, but what we’d talked about was a bigger community with lots of other children his age. He’s got nobody to play with”
“He plays all day long”
“Yes. On his own and with adults” replied Mrs. Firman.
“Well, what’s wrong with that? He’s learning lots and this is a lovely place to grow up”
“He’s not learning to be a child. He’s not having fun with his friends” protested Mrs. Firman.
“He’s got lots of friends. Everyone loves that kid”
“They’re not proper friends. He needs to play with other children his own age”
“Why? Kids his age I’ve seen are immature” said Mr. Firman.
“You were angry with him the other day because he wasn’t as mature as another little boy you’d seen”
“Imagine what he’d be like if he was just tearing around with other kids then. Where’s the structure? Where are the role models? He’ll get into bad habits”
“Wasn’t the whole point of coming here so that he could have a more idyllic childhood?” asked Mrs. Firman.
“Yes. I didn’t want him plonked in front of TVs, computers and games consoles. I wanted him to grow up in a natural environment”
“But where does the fun come in? Where does he get to play, like a little boy? Isn’t in natural that a child should have a childhood?”
“Is he not getting a childhood, Mrs. F?” asked Mr. Firman.
“No. I don’t think he is. I think he’s lonely, Horace”
“Don’t be so ridiculous” snorted Mr. Firman. “He’s only a child. He doesn’t even know what loneliness is. There’s loads of people here to keep him company”
“Yes, but he knows he’s different. He’s little and other people are big. You can see he feels like the odd one out”
“That kid is treated like royalty. If anything he’s spoiled. He gets too much attention if you ask me”
“Have you talked to him? Have you asked him how he feels?” asked Mrs. Firman.
“Talk to him?!? He’s only four. What do 4-year-olds know?”
“I don’t know. Have you bothered to find out?”
“I think I know what my son needs. I’ve spent a lot more time with him than you have” said Mr. Firman, crossing his arms.
Mrs. Firman’s eyes filled with tears. “I feel so guilty about it, Horace. I shouldn’t have worked so hard. It broke my heart leaving every morning to go to the office. I should have quit my job”
“We had bills to pay, Mrs. F. We did what we needed to do”
“We could have been a family. Maybe we wouldn’t be so unhappy if we’d done this sooner. Maybe Cosmo would be happier. He missed his mum” she said, with droplets streaming down her face.
“Don’t beat yourself up dear. Everyone’s got to work”
“You didn’t though, did you? You know I’m deeply resentful that you got to stay home with our little man” she said.
“Is that what this is about? You’re pissed off because I couldn’t work?” he asked.
“No!” she said. “I’m upset that I missed out on all that precious time with my son”
“That was your choice”
“It didn’t feel like a choice. I knew how stressed you were about going back to work. We needed the money. It made sense. We discussed it. It was what we both agreed”
“How was I to know that you weren’t happy with the arrangements if you didn’t tell me?” Mr. Firman asked.
“Do you remember that time when he was rushed into hospital and nobody informed me? I was frantic when I got home and you weren’t there. I’ve never forgiven myself for that. I cried and cried for nights. I said I was going to quit my job. You talked me into staying in that fucking job”
“It was the best thing for the family”
“No. Absolutely no fucking way. You always think you know best. You think you know what’s best for everybody but you’re fucking clueless. Your son is sad. Your son is a lonely little boy and you don’t have a fucking clue. You don’t talk to him, you’re just telling him off all the time. You’re making that little boy miserable and you don’t have a clue who he is or what he wants because you don’t talk to him. You don’t talk to me. You don’t know how much it pains me that I’ve not been around more during my son’s life and I’m not going to suffer any more. We’ve suffered enough at your hands. You’re fucking up this family and I’m going to take him away and put him in school so that he can have a proper childhood”
“You’re never going to take my son away from me” said Mr. Firman, his eyes narrowing.
“Watch me. I’ll walk. This is a non-negotiable. I want what’s best for my son and I’m not going to compromise anymore”
“You don’t think I want what’s best for our son?” asked Mr. Firman sarcastically.
“You don’t even know who he is. You’ve got this imaginary version of him in your head. You don’t listen to him. You’re not at all tuned in to his emotions. You don’t seem to care about his thoughts and feelings. You just want him to act like this perfect child that you’ve dreamt up, but that child isn’t real, Horace. You’re fucking shit to him and it’s ruining his childhood. You’re treating your own preconceived ideas of who he should be as more important than his identity. You don’t give a damn about who he really is”
“The child will grow into whoever we parent him to be” said Mr. Firman.
“You’re WRONG, Horace. He’s got his own identity. He’s got his own personality. You’re so fixated on your own idea of who he is that you can’t see it. We’re not training him like a puppy. We’re just looking after him. We’re guests in his life. He’s a little person, Horace. You’ve got no respect for him”
“Respect for HIM?!? He’s our child. He should look up to us and respect US”
“You’re not the pack alpha. You don’t get his respect by default. You’ve lost my respect, Horace. You were my world. I thought you would protect this family. I would follow you anywhere; do anything you said. You’ve lost my respect. You can’t see that there are other people who have views and opinions that are important too. Respect is a two-way street and you don’t have any respect for anyone but yourself. You talk to me like shit, and you talk to our son like shit. I’ve shown you so much respect and you don’t show me any in return. I don’t like the way you talk to him and I’m not going to put up with it anymore. We trusted you and you’ve let us down. You’re nothing to me. Your son needed you and you’ve let him down. We’re better off without you” said Mrs. Firman.
“Better off without me? Don’t talk rubbish, woman. I’m in charge of this family and you’d all be lost without me. I know what’s best for this family. I say what’s best for this family”
“You’re living in a fantasy world. Don’t test me on this, Horace. I will take my son and I will leave you, without a moment’s hesitation. Don’t think that I wouldn’t. You’ll find yourself totally alone. You’ll be completely alone and wondering what the hell happened”
“You’ll never take my son away from me” said Mr. Firman defiantly, but his eyes were full of fear and he trembled slightly.
The next chapter can be found here: https://medium.com/high-dependency
