Introducing H.A.T.S.
We are the Highfalutin Afternoon Tea Society, and we are on a mission to visit and review all afternoon tea services in the San Francisco area.
Members
Erica “Claudette Cream” Portnoy is trying to pet all the dogs.
Hannah “Not Your Darjeeling” Grimm is likely disappointed with your so-called clotted cream.
Ilana “Ginger Scone” Walder-Biesanz travels around the world critiquing operas and dancing in hoop skirts.
Jasmine Rae Friedrich is saying to give rooibos a chance.
Marissa “Girl Grey” Skudlarek is a playwright whose best writing sessions are fueled by Arnold Palmers.
Tom “Earl of Dark Grey” Lowenthal is trying to automate humanity out of work so that we can spend more time taking tea.
Methodology
At least three H.A.T.S. members will visit each afternoon tea service together and gather their impressions. The members will confer and assign rankings (from one to five teacups) on the tea, the food, and the ambience, as well as an overall ranking. Tea shops will be tagged with descriptors such as kitschy, elegant, casual, historical, and/or modern. Reviews will accompany the rankings and tags.
Statement of values
- It is ‘afternoon tea’, not ‘high tea’. Any venue calling afternoon tea ‘high tea’ deserves a score deduction of a full teacup.
- The tea goes in the cup before the milk.
- The clotted cream goes on the scone before the jam.
- Afternoon tea time is between 2 PM and 5 PM daily. Yes, every single day.
Tea shops to visit
(We welcome additions to this list.)
