Happiness is NOT “a butterfly you cannot catch” as a popular quote suggests. It’s not a destiny we have to wait for to arrive.
It’s also not an internal automatism. Quotes like “If you want to be happy, be.” (Tolstoy) are not helpful to those who are struggling with happiness and blaming themselves for it.
All these popular opinions on happiness see it as either a force of the external or the internal. But neither of those are correct. The science of happiness gives us an empowering message:
To a large degree, happiness depends on our attitudes and actions. It’s like a muscle we can train.
We don’t have to wait for happiness to finally arrive. We can’t give away responsibility to someone or something else. But we also don’t have to despair if we don’t automatically find it inside ourselves. We can take things in your own hands.
And that gives us so much power over our lives. Here’s two quotes on happiness that I can get behind:
Happiness is an inside job
and
Happiness is a form of courage
The latter quote also shows that happiness is not necessarily joy. You can be angry and happy. You can be deeply sad and happy. Happiness doesn’t mean you ignore the problems inside or outside. It gives you the strength to face them.
