Local “Woke” Woman Convinced That if Everyone Would Just Acknowledge What Year it is Nobody Would be Racist Anymore
“I just feel like not enough people are paying attention to the fact that it’s 2020,” she purred between sips of her oat milk iced latte from Intelligentsia. “And it’s simple. You have a calendar in your phone. Check it out.”
As she lifted the phone up to my face I gasped. She was right, the year is 2020. Why aren’t more people hip to this knowledge? I fell to my knees in amazement. If more people just realized what year it is, maybe all the violent riots, vicious scandals and endless bigotry could indeed be avoided.
She looked into my eyes with the knowing look of a secure trust-fund child of the suburbs. “I know, right? Isn’t it shocking? People just need to, like, get with the program, you know?”
She continued to list offensive slurs, and after each one she explained how we just need to tell the people who use those terms that they must be confused about what year it is, and then they wouldn’t use those words anymore.
I told her the calendar move was key, once people see for themselves visually that it indeed is the year 2020 they would really have no choice but to give up their old ways.
“And I hate that I always have to be the wokesperson,” she continued, “like, reminding people that their ideas are passé, but c’est la vie.”
She truly intrigued me. Her superficial knowledge of french sayings, her Lululemon jogging outfit… I felt there were so many more solutions swirling around inside that beautifully sheltered mind of hers. I wanted to ask her more questions, get more answers, but she really had to get to her outdoor goat yoga class, so we parted ways after following each other on Instagram.
