Begin Again

“We are always updating. Every moment is new.”

Begin Again

They know…this isn’t the path they chose.

Remote Learning

But if I teach my children the way to Begin Again I think I can check off a big parenting lesson.

And that’s the process of laying bare, outside yourself, walking into the unknown.

It is scary. And the cold draft of fear creeps up in the form of uncertainty, sadness and unfamiliarity.

I. Want. My. Old. Life. NOW.

If photographs tell us anything, it’s that the universe demands we stop time in order to observe it. We are always updating. Every moment is new.

I hope my children carry this time of fear and soul discomfort through the 2020’s, 30’s and beyond. When they are faced with stark change I want them to remember how they Began Again.

And it was cold at first. Loss hung in air. We lost family. We lost friends. Freezer truck morgues outside hospitals became normal the month of April. Mom and dad lost former co-workers they read about on social media and burst into tears.

Then one day, Joy within the New Normal emerged.

Cousin and his lady had a baby. One day a cute new mask fit your personality so succinctly it looked totally at home on your face.

The outright authentic memory of the 7PM Cheer for essential workers made us smile and we realized there is still room for delight in the midst of devastation.

The World turned on itself but we turned to each other.

Me — Remember this year Bud. One day you will tell your grandkids I will never meet

I could tell he didn’t really hear the last part this morning. He set up his laptop and logged on while I thought of that last part.

“The grandkids I’ll never meet” and at first it made me sad. Then I went back to that place in me that knows my job is not to be here his whole life, but to give him enough kisses to feel loved when he is not chosen.

• To bestow enough respect so he can recognize safety inside his soul
• To provide enough structure to enable him to seek order among chaos
• And to let him brave the cold draft of Life’s Uncertainty so brazenly he MUST Push Through

I must prepare my son to face the chilly, jagged edges of unwanted change, look it in the eye and say “OK… God help me….

…..for I will Begin Again”.

#YesIAmThatMom