Seeing-the-Finish-Line Reflections

First things first, I passed my C# exam on the first try, and earned a “red-belt”!!

Real time footage of me finding out I passed.

Ok. That’s done.

I’ve been doing some reflecting this week. Maybe it’s the full moon, maybe its mercury in retrograde, or maybe it’s the fact that I woke up today and it was 26 degrees out again. I don’t know. But here is what I do know. 78 days ago I did not know how to code. Maybe I knew a sliver of HTML and CSS, but seeing code on another person’s text editor looked like hieroglyphics to me. While working at The Iron Yard I would try to follow along with our instructor’s “Introduction to code” crash courses (shout out to Tasty Code) and only get as far as downloading a text editor before getting totally lost and giving up. Please note: I kept that text editor downloaded on my computer for a long time, the way a 6 year old girl carries an empty purse.

Yet, here we are with 30 days left at Coding Dojo. In 30 days, I will have graduated a coding bootcamp and completed something I never thought I could, or would, do. This journey has been a whirlwind, and I can’t believe it’s almost over. I don’t want it to be almost over.

The Saturday before my program started, I was sitting on the floor of my AirBNB, while my mom sat quietly reading a book on the uncomfortable futon (where I’m also writing this from now. Still uncomfortable). I remember trying to shove knowledge into my brain so I could be as prepared as possible for Monday, and thinking “Holy sh*t, what did I get myself into?”. I truly thought I would never be able to comprehend and understand the material I was trying to get acquainted with.

On day one of class, my heart was in my throat and I thought I was going to vomit on the bus. I sat, clutching my phone in my hand, texting my sisters to try and calm down. I was so nervous for what I was about to begin.

I thought there was no way I could make it out alive on the other side. I thought that I was in way over my head. I thought everyone in that room on day one would see right through me. I thought they would all know I didn’t belong there and shouldn’t be there, or that I didn’t know what I was talking about. I thought they were all smarter than me, or more skilled than me. I thought they all knew more than I did. I thought they all prepared better than me. By day three, I was just praying I would at least make it through the whole program and not have to return home with my tail between my legs, a code-school drop out.

But it did get better. Not easier, but better. I realized we all had no idea what was happening, and almost all of us were starting from the same point. We got acclimated. We all became friends. We all relied on each other.

I guess that’s why this all feels so surreal. I can’t believe how far we have all come and how quickly the time has passed.

So in 22 days, I will graduate. And in 30, I’ll be done with the program as a whole. I’ll be a full-stack Junior Developer in three different stacks.

A month to me used to seem like the longest time in the world to have keeping me from the end of the school year, but when I realize that I only have one month left of this program, I want to take time back and relive it all over again, even the crying and the broken code. Ok, maybe not the crying, but I do want to do it all one more time.

Whatever your challenge is, soak up the experience. When you’re in the hard stuff, and in the thick of it, remember that you’re solving your problems, your working on your happiness, and you’re only improving and bettering your situation.

And If I have any advice for anyone going through, or thinking of going through a program like this, it would be the following:

1. You’re not behind. Everyone is starting from the same point. You can do this.
2. Lean on your cohort. Lean on your peers. Help each other, and encourage each other.
3. Remember to close your computer and go the f*ck to sleep.

In other Life-in-Chicago news:

• It snowed today. It’s April and it freaking snowed.
• There’s supposed to be more snow this week.
• We just started our final stack, MEAN, and it’s known as the hardest one yet. Excellent.
• Also — would you be interested in reading more about my journey post-code school? If so let me know!

2 stacks down. Check me out.