[satire] The Weekly Top Ten: What has been Homeland Security’s biggest contribution?

Brought to you by David Lettersham (tongue firmly planted in cheek).

In a recent poll, the American Public was asked what Homeland Security’s biggest contribution. Here are the top 10:

#10 — Ensuring the fence industry is safe for years to come

#9 — Reducing global warming by supporting the “Ice Bucket Challenge”

#8 — Support defense contractor’s business model pivot to school support.

#7 — Ensuring “Lucy” can always pull away the football from “Charlie Brown” without any repercussions.

#6 — Making sure all social media platforms secure all the funny and cute kitty videos

#5 — Allowing the Terminator series to go on forever and still be current

#4 — Supporting the growth of the job market for ESL teachers and marketing for Rosetta Stone

#3 — Providing new social organizations for ranchers and the those that feel lost

#2 — The ability for Al Sharpton to reinvent himself, over and over

#1 — Making global citizens feel even more marginalized

The reality of American perceptions?…