Graduated and Lost

Having just graduated from University, I confess that I have never been more lost.

Everyone’s heard of mid-life crisis, but there’s another crisis midway of that too. It’s probably the reason why the mid-life crisis exists, cause people mess that up. I'd call it the quarter-life crisis.

Quarter-life crisis is summed up perfectly by the picture above. Cruising on with life when suddenly the track below me vanishes. I call this track Education, which I have been dutifully following its path for about 20 years. Quarter-life crisis hits when the track ends and suddenly I’m free to head in any direction I want. That's where I got lost.

Family and friends expected me to continue on straight, as if that’s where the path continues to run. And I started to feel the pressure of getting a job:

“Get a stable job there. You will have job security there.”

“Why don’t you consider the standard career path? Most of your cohort is doing it.”

“Don’t worry. After a few months, things will get comfortable.”

To be honest, I almost followed their advice. It felt right to follow the standard career path then. Everyone does it with no questions asked anyways. Pretty much like mindless sheep, but that’s my society in a nutshell!

As I spent time thinking about it, something within me felt off. Comfort. Security. Following the standard. Is this what I truly want? Looking at the path people expect me to take, I just couldn’t accept it. In fact, imagining my future self down that path scares me. Monday blues. Dragging myself to work every morning. Thinking about the next vacation to get away from life. Unhappy but I don’t have a choice because I am anchored by debt.

And why am I compelled to meet the expectations of others? I understand that these people mean well for me, but that is why I am being guided to path they presume is the safest for me.

So what am I really looking for anyways? Honestly, I don’t have a clue at all. However, what I do know is how my life shouldn’t be like.

What scares me is the thought that all I will achieve in this kind of life is to get by comfortably. Where I conform and work as a cog in a machine to achieve someone else’s dream. Where I throw all my dreams and ambitions out of the window for a career that I find meaningless. Where the only thing keeping me in the job is the paycheck every month to pay off debts.

I could not accept the kind of life my society expects of me as a graduate.

In the end, all this pondering led me to understand more on what I am looking for in life. I wanted a life driven by purpose. Work that is so meaningful it becomes passion. I want a life that impacts others for the better.

My parents worked hard to give me a very comfortable life so far. Everything I ever needed has been well provided for. And I thank my parents for it. So I feel that it is such a disappointment if all that I achieve, after being provided so much, is to settle for an average comfortable life for myself. There are so many others out there suffering. How can I not do something about it?

Ultimately, I need to make my own choice towards a life worth living for. Instead of regretting at the end that I didn’t do what I truly wanted in life, why not take ownership of my own life now?

“ Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.”

-Robert Frost