After My Divorce, I Dated a Man with a Tiny Penis
And it was exactly what I needed.
In 2006, I got divorced after only two and a half years of marriage. It’s not as if my divorce was messy (we were young and childless), but it was painful and a little bit strange.
Because I suffered from a condition called vaginismus, my husband and I never had penetrative sex. And since I was naive in my early twenties and we were both coming out of the evangelical purity culture of the 90s, we each seemed to think that penetrative P-in-V sex was what we should be having. All of the time.
Unfortunately for me, my husband was very well endowed, and that only seemed to make our attempts at penetration more painful.
There are different schools of thought about vaginismus and whether it’s purely psychological or a mixture of physical and psychological problems, but the end result is the same. Women struggle to experience penetration without a great deal of pain.
And while two and a half years is quite short in terms of a marriage, it is a very long time to live in shame. Rather than seeing the problem as a we thing, I saw it as a me thing. I felt that it was my body, my mind, my problem, and 100% my fault.
