I DON’T NEED TO KNOW
I CAN FEEL HOW IT IS
TO BE HERE BEFORE
WIND BLOWS AGAIN
AND I WILL NOT
BE WITH YOU.
(He looks at her, trying to understand what he feels.)
- Hello creature.
- Why are you looking at me?
- I’m trying to look into you.
- Into me?
- Yes. To connect with your essence, with you beyond your skin.
- You are weird.
- That is probably true, but I don’t think the way I look at you is weird. But that’s maybe only the proof that I am weird. What do you think?
- I don’t know.
- What do you feel when I look at you?
(He moves closer and looks into her eyes noticing embers of fire surrounding her pupils. She looks back at him and smiles gently.)
- I feel a familiar but distant sensation of tingling in my feet.
- What about your palms?
(She takes a moment.)
- There is a layer of energy on my palms.
- That’s interesting.
- You say that a lot.
(He smiles with love.)
- It’s true. Everything is interesting for me, especially how we develop connections between ourselves.
(She smiles back and moves closer. Her skin feels electric. He shivers.)
- Why are you here? (He asks.)
- What do you mean?
- In this specific moment. You are here. It is your decision. Why are you here?
- I felt like seeing you. I think…
- I’m glad you did. And now, when you are seeing me, what are you feeling?
(He looks at her, as she lies her head on his belly.)
- Why are we here? The two of us, right here, right now?
- You’ve asked this question before.
- I know. But it still keeps popping into my head. With every stone we pass on this short path of ours, I feel like I can almost figure it out. And then I take another breath and this feeling disappears.
- Does it make you sad?
(He thinks for a moment.)
- I don’t think so. I am just curious and I feel that there is a reason for all this. What do you think?
- I don’t think there is a reason.
- I feel that I’ve known you before and now I am rediscovering this connection. But it’s not true, at least in this lifetime. We don’t have a past.
- Or future. We exist in this bubble out of time.
- Perhaps I am trying to explain something that doesn’t need explanation.
- I think that you are interested in existential questions more than me.
(She looks at the landscape, mesmerised by the view.)
YOU NOTICE ME AND COME OVER
WE SHARE A BRIEF MOMENT
BEFORE THE EVEREXCITING WORLD
TAKES YOU SOMEWHERE NEW.
I STAY AND OBSERVE
FEELING LOVE AND SADNESS
KNOWING THAT THINGS GROW WITH TIME
AND TIME IS A SCARCE RESOURCE.
- What would you like to let go of?
- I’m thinking about it.
(She continues to write in her notebook.)
- Should I say it out loud?
- You should do whatever feels right to you.
- I guess it would make it more “real”…
(She finishes writing, rips a page and throws it into the fire. They look in silence at shadows dancing on glaring embers.)
MY HEART IS A BIZARRE WEIRDO
STRANGELY BEATING IN A PECULIAR RHYTHM.
THERE IS A PATTERN, CYCLE, CLOCKWORK, FILLING ME AGAIN
WITH THE SAME EMOTIONS.
WHAT WILL I FIND THERE? WHERE?
WHEREVER I GO NEXT — DAY, MONTH, LIFETIME.
IT’S ALL A SUM OF MOMENTS AND FINDING A WAY TO GROW.
NOT TODAY. TODAY I REST. NO PRESSURE APPLIED.
REST MY SOUL, MY EYES, MY HEART, MY BODY. SLEEP AND DREAM.
SEE WITHIN AND OUTWITH. RECONNECT. REFOCUS. RELEARN.
LOVE ALL INCLUDING MYSELF.
ACCEPT LIFE. GIVE.
(He can’t sleep anymore. The Sun rises inside of his body and fills him with Love. She is just next to him, still sleeping covered in layers and blankets.)
(He moves close to her and touches her gently, once again sensing a powerful driving force inside. Her skin vibrates under her clothes. His skin desperately tries to find a way to touch hers. Mere thought makes him shiver.)
- Stop looking at me so weird.
(He turns away and hides in his thoughts. He listens to the world around him. For a brief moment he is at peace.)
(He thinks to himself.)
- I am sorry for wanting to burn while you are in such a peaceful state. It is selfish of me and I told you that I will give you the space you need. I will be here, dreaming of you opening your eyes and looking at me with love and reaching to touch me.
(And she does.)
(Her gaze triggers an image of two bodies becoming one flame. He feels the ticking clock, time running out, the sense of the very end. His body wants her so much, here and now, surrounded by ancient energy and the morning Sun.)
(He reaches under and feels a bit of her skin. He is overwhelmed and forgets to breathe. Love replaces air. The world ends.)
(She touches his face gently, closes her eyes and falls asleep. She is peaceful and as beautiful as she can be. Her pure vulnerable self. Breathing.)
(Time dissolves into a blur of grass, Moon, Ocean, rocks and her dancing with him in the air, as the wind blows them away.)
- Where are we going? (He asks her.)
(She grabs his hand.)
- We are already here.
- I have a feeling it is the last time I see you.
- Looks like it.
- I would like to say something significant, something to emphasize the importance of this time we’ve had. But I don’t have words anymore.
- You don’t have to say anything.
- I feel I should thank you. I might not know the reason of this connection, but I feel that I needed it. Somehow you reflected my weaknesses back at me. I am impatient, I am sometimes desperate for love. I put too much pressure. I give all of myself and I burn. But I need fuel to sustain this flame. I need love. But also I need to observe, accept and let go. Much work to be done.
- I’m sure you will find many beautiful connections with people on your path.
- There is a price to pay for this openness. Everything is built of light and darkness. And goodbyes never get easier.
- Sorry for being distant sometimes.
- You don’t need to apologise. Thank you for being yourself.
(She grabs his hand gently and moves close to his face. She kisses his forehead with all the love she is. He feels a wave of energy filling his body. His Soul smiles.)
ANSWERS ARE USUALLY SIMPLE.
HIDDEN IN BURNING EMBERS,
THE MOONLIGHT, SOUNDS OF WATER
AND BIRDS AROUND.
IN HER BREATH BECOMING FASTER.
OBSERVATION OF ALL.
IN RUNNING DOWN THE BEACH
THEY JUST NEED TO BE NOTICED.
ONE MORE GLIMPSE
OF HER BEFORE SHE DISAPPEARS
INTO THE SUNSET. MAYBE
ONE MORE SMILE AND KISS.
SOON I WILL BE ON MY OWN
I LIKE BEING ON MY OWN.
BUT I WILL MISS THIS LOVE.
I WILL KEEP ON WALKING
WITH AN OPEN HEART, WHAT ELSE?
BUT NOW, I AM STILL HERE
IN HER CALMING PRESENCE.