emotion#30: Calm

Photo by the author.

“This is the end, beautiful friend”.

But the end is never the end.

My biggest goal is not to be a good writer, or to make money, change the world, or be the best version of myself.

My biggest goal is to be prepared to die.

I don’t want to fear something I don’t know, simply because I don’t know it. For all I know, death is simply a gate that leads somewhere else, somewhere I have never seen or experienced before.

I don’t want to waste my life by not being aware that it is temporary. I don’t want to trick myself into believing in immortality: I want to be awake. I want to see the whole panorama; I want to be ready, conscious, peaceful.

My consciousness is like a newborn baby, and I want to take it further, so much further. Writing is a tool to get there. Connecting with other people is a tool to get there, and so is the empirical acknowledgment of the unified field that we are all a part of.

More often than not, I distract myself from this pursuit with smaller worries, pleasures, and goals. So here’s to remembering: remembering death, seeing ephemerality as beauty, accepting. Letting go. Peacefully.