The Required
I call my grandfather every Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day and tell him the same thing,
“Thank you for your service, grandpa.”
He responds in the same way, “You’re welcome…we did what we had to do — and I’d do it again if necessary.”
There’s no “aw shucks” in his tone. Nor is there pomp and circumstance. Just a sense of duty, done well, done for the benefit of others.
My grandfather will turn 103 in July, Lord willing. His mind is still sharp, his grip still strong, his Jersey accent still thick (despite living in Indiana for four decades). He’s the oldest living veteran in his county. He drives — yes, drives — almost every day to find coffee and conversation.
But he doesn’t talk about Normandy, the Hurtgen Forest, the Ardennes. Sure, he’ll discuss a few basic facts (when asked directly), but he does not disclose what he experienced when fighting in WWII…other than these generalities: that he was often scared, that he witnessed terrible things, and that he felt fortunate to come home alive.
My grandfather has never considered himself a hero — in war or in any other context. And I’d wager that he has never considered himself any type of leader, either.
He’s nearly 103, he’s a WWII vet, he had to quit school to help his mom raise his three younger brothers when his dad died in the 1930s, he made a career out of designing, building, and fixing things, and he’s my grandfather…so I will, out of deep respect, not argue with him regarding how he views himself.
However, I will argue here that this “non-hero” and “non-leader” has lived his life doing the very thing we need our heroes — and leaders — to do: what has to be done.
Often, we want our leaders to do what’s beautiful, what’s memorable, what’s extraordinary, what’s unique. Of course, none of these things is bad, and in fact, all are great within the appropriate context. However, none of these things matters unless leaders first do what is required.
Our human nature often wants to skip that part — the required. Because the required is often mundane, difficult, and thankless. Yet within the required is where the heart of a leader is revealed — because within the required is where the burden of leadership is the heaviest.
For my grandfather, like so many other WWII soldiers, and like so many other soldiers who fought in conflicts before and after the 1940s, the required was profoundly scary, unbelievably awful to witness, and regularly life-threatening.
Therefore, we need to remember, to honor, to give thanks for the courage, the humility, and the sacrifice demonstrated by the men and women in our Armed Forces. We need to be inspired, to be challenged by their character, their conduct. We need to recognize that doing what has to be done is indeed the first obligation of leadership…
And that a daily, wholehearted willingness to “do it again” is indeed heroic.
