Recognition vs. Resolutions: Love The Journey Not The Wish
Yesterday, a colleague asked me how I was doing on my New Year’s resolutions. Now halfway through the month of January, after the craze of goal setting, I feel safe saying that this year I didn’t make any.
Not because my life is perfect or because I’ve “got it all figured” out, but just the opposite.
Each year in the roar emanating from New Years Eve, our conversations, news feed and perhaps our own thoughts are filled with the question “what are your New Years’ resolutions”?. Some of us deflect the question, stating that since we seem to never achieve them why waste the energy identifying them, while others thrust into January full with energy and optimistic commitment to that which they put on paper.
This year however, after much reflection, I came to the conclusion that too often do we judge ourselves critically when making resolutions, starting from a point of obvious fault and seeking through constant vigilance that THIS year I will do better; I will become slimmer, get smarter, be kinder, love more, make more, etc,.
However for (the rest of) 2017, I propose a different approach.
I am challenging myself and each one of you to not make any New Year’s resolutions but instead take this opportunity to reflect on years past, to identify and recognize all the things done right or important lessons learned.
That if we look at ourselves in a kinder light, perhaps we would see the amazing things we are learning through reflecting we can use this year to amplify those that make the biggest impact. That in 2017 we recognize holistically who we are and seek to become a better self instead of working towards an idealized version of ourselves.
With that spirit in mind, below are my New Years Recognitions, the things about my journey so far that I have learned and want to recognize in order to amplify. I hope you take this challenge to heart and spend the next few weeks recognizing and applauding who you are and your own journey instead of judging who you wish you were.
Enjoy the start of 2017 and good luck!
My New Year’s Recognitions
[Lazy Days Should Be Embraced] Those who know me know I have had a tendency to always be busy, always taking some new project while giving 110% of myself to my work, friendships and hobbies. One of the best unexpected outcomes of moving to Atlanta some 4 years ago was understanding, forgiving and ultimately embracing lazy days filled with Netflix, PJs and absent-minded activity. I used to think I was great at being lazy, until I realized that my version of lazy was working from home in an attempt to maximize productivity and claim laziness. While I still have pangs of “lazy guilt” I have come to understand the importance of checking out and taking time by myself to just do nothing.
[Unique Me Is Better Than Ideal You] I love motivational books, “10 Tricks to …” lists, blogs on happiness and articles sharing what every top CEO knows. There is something so satisfactory in knowing the tips and tricks of the famous as if in beating the first 30 minutes of my day or using that new organizational app will make me a better me. After collecting an immense amount of data I have come to realize that every person has their own recommendations due to the simple fact that everyone is different and that different things work for different people. That there is no pre-determined best routines or advice that will help me become a better me. That in fact understanding myself, loving myself and embracing myself will always be better. That my unique quirks are what help me succeed and by being truthful with myself I will find that which makes me stronger. Although I do still love those lists….!
[Goals are Organizational Not Motivational] This insight is one that I have only recently discovered and one that I now feel very strongly about. Goals are not a motivational tool. They are simply the articulation of an internal desire, a roadmap and a starting point to achieve that which you seek to achieve. They are not tools to motivate or to encourage action. This is why that “goal” to lost 10 pounds never works — the words mean nothing if they are not backed up by a burning internal desire to be achieved. The words simply help us think, dissect, unpack and plan, nothing more, nothing less. By understanding this, I can more critically assess my real goals and organize my life to ensure their success.
Enjoy the journey — Heather
