The Work Is Its Own Reward
Now, more than ever, we need to be making stuff
From the How to Have Written podcast:
Now that we’re living in the end times, I’m wondering what’s the point in finishing my novel? Why should I spend all this time and mental energy creating something that probably won’t be read by anyone? Shouldn’t I just give up?
— Auhwktor in Windowville, Maine
That is a timely question. And I think it’s a valid question. But I completely disagree with the conclusion that you sort of make. I would argue that it’s more important now than ever to be writing or working on whatever you want to work on. Putting your energy into something creative, whether or not it’s ever going to be read or listened to or watched by anybody in the future, really isn’t the point. Or at least it shouldn’t be the point.
It’s understandable that we want to get something out there into the world, and we want people to like it. But that is banking your happiness on other people’s nervous systems. You know what I mean? You’re thinking that you’re going to get your contentment from your work by the pleasure that somebody else gets listening to it. You probably won’t be there when they read it or listen to it or watch it anyway. So, you’re not going to get anything from that ultimately anyway.
What you want to do is find the pleasure in the work right here when you’re doing it right now. Because this is the only way that you’re going to. I mean, if not, then where? If you’re not getting your pleasure from here, then what are you going to get it from? Because you’re not going to get it from them. And you’re not going to get it from the money. If you make money. (I don’t know if the economy will exist in the apocalypse. I’m sure there’ll be some kind of an economy.)
The work is its own reward. The work is its own reward. Because it has to be its own reward. The point is that you have to find what’s fun about the process right now. Because if you’re not doing that, then why are you even doing this in the first place? You know what I mean?
We have these activities that we do like projects, hobbies, things that we do that may or may not ever make us any money. And we theoretically do them because we love the work. Or we’re interested in it. But then when it comes time to do the work, a lot of times we get all tense (Again, I’m talking to me. And, Auhwktor, I’m also talking to you.) We get all tense and we don’t enjoy the process. So then why the fuck are we doing it anyway? If that’s the case, if we’re not going to have any fun with it, why am I wasting my time with this? Which is a good question!
Why are you doing it? If you’re doing it so that people can read it, then you might as well stop anyway, because you’re never going to get that pleasure. You’re never going to get the pleasure from that. If you’re doing it because you love doing it… Because you like walking around with a story in your head that you’re putting together. You like waiting in line at the supermarket with a thing to think about. And you like having time alone with your notebook where you just close out the rest of the world and focus on this one thing that is just for you. That’s the joy of writing. Or creating anything, in my opinion.
So what I would say is to answer your question, shouldn’t you just quit? No, absolutely not. You should continue with your novel. As a matter of fact, you should get more into it. You should try to find ways to connect with it better. Try to figure out ways that you will have a better, easier time enjoying it. Enjoying the work. You should allow yourself to get more engrossed in it. Now, more than ever. There’s so much bad shit out there, so it’s the perfect time. If you already have a novel going, you’re already ahead of the curve, because you have a thing to get into. You don’t even have to go find one. You have a thing you can retreat into. Someplace to find sanctuary, find comfort. Because the world is hard out there, but you have a thing that’s yours. And you can hold on to it no matter how bad things get. And here’s the interesting thing: most likely, the more you retreat into it, and the more you make it about you, the better it will connect with other people. Because you can’t ever predict what they want. Not really. All you can do is make something that is satisfying to you and hope that you find the readers who will make those similar connections. Or will make their own connections with the work. By making it more personal to you, you’ll stand a better chance of bringing pleasure to the other people living in your cave when you read it out to them by the firelight.
So, anyway, I think that answers the question. Auhwktor, I hope that you get back into the novel. Or stick with the novel. And anybody else out there. You might also want to consider getting back to your novel or your album, your song, getting back into your instrument. Because this is the perfect time. You can take an eye away from the sideshow and bring it back to what’s important to you.
