Being Assertive at Work
Now that we have learned how to listen to others, build rapport with new people, and strengthen our relationships with our long-time friends, we will now learn to be assertive. More specifically…
How Should You Assert Yourself At Work?
Speak Confidently/Proclaim: In a work setting, it is very common to see people speaking very politically correct (PC) so that they do not offend one another. However, as we have learned from another one of our previous blogs, speaking PC all the time leads to superficial interactions and relationships that lack meaning. Speaking confidently and proclaiming your viewpoints let your coworkers know exactly where you stand on certain issues. This is very important because it shows that you are an honest person that has an important value system.
Say “No”: Knowing when to say no to your coworkers is a must. If you are a pushover and say yes to every little request, before long you will realize that you have very little time for yourself. Not only that, you will begin to lose respect for yourself as you so graciously give your time away to your coworkers and leave none left over for yourself. By saying no, you also let you coworkers now where you stand. Although this may be uncomfortable at the time, it will actually build respect with the majority of your coworkers because, again, it lets them know that you have strong values that you live by. Most importantly, you will not feel overwhelmed as you attempt to satisfy everyone. This is a very freeing feeling.
Handle Put-downs: The two best ways to handle put-downs from other, whether it be a sarcastic remark or a genuine gripe from a coworker, are to not react and question their put-down. For instance, by not reacting to a put-down from a coworker, you win the interaction by not giving them the reaction they desire. The reason someone sends a put down at you is because they desire a certain reaction. Don’t give it to them! Second, question their assertion by asking, “What makes you say that?” This saying simply “tends to stop people in their tracks” by forcing them to rationalize their put-down to you!
Bonus! The last tip once you have implemented the above techniques is to praise the behavior you want from your coworkers! By doing this, you will gradually get them to act how you want — a very powerful technique! Hope this helps!
In response to this article,
Reflection/What I Have Learned
Since writing this blog, I have implemented these strategies and had some interesting findings! The strategy I implemented most frequent was to speak confidently and proclaim statements. This strategy was wonderfully effective for me as it produced a “night and day”effect. Before writing this blog, I would speak very timid most of the time and almost never proclaim anything due to a fear of my ideas being rejected. However, since I have implemented this strategy, I have found that people perceive me as more competent and authoritative simply because of the way I am speaking gives off an impression of me being confident in myself. People gravitate towards confident people as they know they can rely on them. This was a key finding for me that I will continue to utilize!
Potts, S., & Potts C. (2013). <i>Assertiveness: how to be strong in every situation<i>. Retrieved from http://ebookcentral.proquest.com
