Rapport: Strengthening Old Ties
In our last blog, we discussed how to expand our sphere of influence by making new friends. In this blog, we will focus on keeping and strengthening the ties we already have. Here are some tips.
Take it easy on them: If one of your friends forgets your birthday or something important to you, don’t get offended and start thinking of the reasons why they forgot. JUST LET IT GO. This person if a good friend of yours for a reason, there is no need in getting fed up with small, minute details.
Be Completely Transparent: As it may be beneficial to be politically correct in front of new people to avoid offending them, too much of this can actually be COUNTERPRODUCIVE with people whom you have established relationships with. By being completely transparent with your old pals, you are communicating to them that you trust them with whatever you are telling them. This further builds your bond of trust.
Acknowledge Them on Social Media: Ok, so you don’t have to talk to them every day, or even a lot for that matter on social media. However, by writing a direct message to your friend on Facebook about how their new job is going shows them that you are thinking about them and cared enough to ask. This is very powerful as it lets them know that they are important to you.
Frequent, Brief Contact: Rather than sending your buddy a 300+ word email once every year or so to let them know how you are doing, send them a text or two each week. By doing this, again, it shows them that you are thinking about them without overwhelming them. Also, this strategy allows you to keep up on the day-to-day aspects of their lives so that your correspondence together isn’t a one-and-done deal, but more of an on-going conversation.
What I Have Learned/Reflection
Since writing this blog, I have been able to put its principles into practice. Here is what I did: My brother is a basketball coach at Daemen College, and because of this, he is very busy and we have not seen each other too much since school has started. Since I wrote this blog, I have been in contact with him every single day — just a little bit. Since I have done this, we have been talking with each other more frequently and we have both been more “up-to-speed” on each other’s lives. In fact, I spent the night at his apartment last night and we hung out and relaxed.
The Best (Non-Awkward) Ways to Make New Friends in Your 20s and 30sShana Lebowitz — https://greatist.com/happiness/how-to-make-keep-friends
