The Camera Doesn’t Lie: How Recording My Sessions With Clients Exposed Everything I Got Wrong
What happens when your empathy collides with ethical guardrails? As a new psychologist, I discovered that professionalism isn’t about perfection. It arises from messy moments. Clients sometimes cross boundaries. Plus, seeing my nervous nods and stumbles in recordings is awkward. Yet focused practice, honest feedback, and ethical adherence build your client-facing game.
Your professional persona will evolve as a coach or psychologist. In your training and early years, you focus on your professional image and how you appear to others.
See yourself from another angle. One of the best tools I found was recording sessions with the client’s consent. Then, I would watch those sessions with my supervisor. Some things I found embarrassing might not stand out to my supervisor. Something I thought was acceptable could spark a surprising and illuminating discussion. It might be small things, like nodding or leaning in too much. You might get too caught up in the client’s issues or rush to find solutions.
I learned early on that a good supervisor can tell if you put in too much or too little energy with your client. Too little energy is quite apparent. You’re not being present or caring enough for your client. But, too much energy can cause burnout over time. So striking the right balance is essential but the balance also applies to authenticity. Unlike a big chat with your bestie, you are not the client’s friend. You are also not a complete blank slate. You have a library of scientific information that could relate to the client’s situation.
The client might say things that you find funny. There can also be light moments in coaching or therapy that are important to note. One of the things your supervisor might pick up is your body language. Have you closed off your arms or legs to the client? Are you sitting directly across from them? Do you have open and friendly body language, seem closed off, or a bit scared? There is the right balance between these factors, and they combine to reflect how you show up for the client. Getting feedback is essential. Deliberate practice can boost your skills to the highest level.
Deliberate practice is essential. Deliberate practice means working with others on specific parts of your coaching or therapy skills. For example, in tennis, you might focus on specific techniques. You can hire a coach or find a partner to help you practice. While the coaching or therapy field offers freedom, it also requires taking responsibility. Where can you begin with deliberate practice? There is a handy Deliberate Practice Taxonomy as a starting point. Darryl Chow and Scott Miller have developed this taxonomy.
Taking active responsibility for your practice is significant, and it can be a little scary sometimes. As a provisional psychologist or new coach under supervision, you will develop your understanding of ethics and professional communication. No matter your role, you’ll discover how to act professionally in your field. This includes your duties to either medical or organisational stakeholders linked to your client.
This is again part of the coaching space’s responsibility. After a while, you receive your registration or certification, and there may be a feeling of “Wow, they’re letting me run loose.” It’s also important to regularly remind yourself of your ethics and responsibilities. It’s always worth checking in with supervisors or peers during tricky situations in your career. As a provisional psychologist, I had several clients. They raised ethical concerns about boundaries, mandatory reporting, and self-disclosure.
I always played it safe and asked supervisors and peers with specific expertise for help. While working with a client who had possible forensic issues, I sought a peer with a forensic background. I also had a client who made me feel unsafe. This peer was smart and had removed her identity from social media early in her career. She encouraged me to do the same or at least change my identity to make it harder to find me.
One of my earlier supervisors changed her identity for ethical reasons. You don’t really understand the importance of clear boundaries until you meet a client. Sometimes, they can be unsettling. That’s when you see how vital ethical guidelines are to our professional identity. I usually played it safe with self-disclosure. Still, some clients asked me personal questions. And the great thing about ethics and that professional self is that we can make our boundaries clear around us as professionals.
I even had a client who went in to hug me, and again, I would ask them: would you hug your doctor? And this keeps a clear physical boundary, which is necessary. Other coaches or psychologists will be hit unexpectedly by different challenges. Clients might want to meet with you to gather evidence against their manager. This could lead them to take legal action. Some clients may have hidden motives when they come to therapy. They might ask you to write a report that benefits them in other ways. As part of your professional self, you need to be clear in what you are and are not about; this is your boundary.
Some client presentations can be challenging for various reasons. You might need to refer some of these clients to others. Client care is the top priority. So, when you refer or take action, ensure it’s in the client’s best interest. Also, remember to prioritise your safety and set clear boundaries.
Supervisors or peers can help normalise certain situations. Sometimes, you might feel shame or ineffectiveness. They can remind you that coaches or psychologists aren’t superhuman. Sharing their experiences can help you feel better about your struggles. Working in these people’s professions truly represents a calling.
It’s not for everyone, so be careful as your professional self changes. You need to balance being authentic with following ethical guidelines. Also, use professional discretion and seek supervision or peer insight regularly. Don’t isolate yourself. Connecting with others who share your challenges can help you avoid burnout and support your long-term career success.
Due to client confidentiality, we can’t discuss many of these issues openly. So, keeping your professional network strong throughout your career is key. Your colleagues will help you build your authenticity and professional persona over time.
Watching myself fumble taught me something important. True expertise isn’t about being perfect. It’s about the willingness to keep improving your skills, even with awkward pauses and boundary checks. Let ethics and peer advice guide you in becoming the coach or clinician you are meant to be.
