HUMANS OF RINGWOOD: Will you know me then?
My heart is breaking and rivers pour from my eyes
I hear anguished animal sounds rising up in my throat
I’m not weeping. I’m wailing loudly now
It doesn’t sound like me and scares me witless
But my hands grip the steering wheel
As I negotiate the near deserted streets.
My whole face is wet and my nose begins to run
Disgusting drool trickles from my contorted mouth
I don’t care.
Even when a car pulls up beside me at the lights
And I feel his eyes looking at me
I don’t care.
I can’t control this, can’t pretend it didn’t just happen
Somehow I know I must let this grief overwhelm me
I must face it head on, feel it in every untouched part of me
It has never been this bad before
It can never be this bad again or I’ll die …
That bounce-back part of me might perish
Like a too-often stretched rubber band.
I’m adrift now, given over to anguish.
Now TIME will steal our exquisite moments
We cannot recapture moments of laughter, of stories, of bliss …
You will be different when this is over, forever changed … grown
I pray, God, that we will one day, someday, who knows when
Hold each other tightly again, beating heart to beating heart
Look deeply into smiling eyes, recognise and remember … love.
