How My Dad Shaped My Career
Alternative Title: How an almost college dropout got to work with startups.
I’ve always been proud of my father. He and his parents immigrated from Europe (after serving in WWII) to America in the 1960s. Real, rural, poor middle America.
But he was smart and resilient and wrestled his way into Duke.. then Harvard for his MBA… and lastly to MIT for his Ph.D. All the while, he served 20 years in the US Navy and supported a family of six. A real underachiever, as you can tell.
But while these accomplishments (read: achieving the American Dream) might be enough to make any daughter proud, there’s a few more special lessons I’ve learned from my dad (not including how make a mean Manhattan).
INCLUSION
It’s 2006. I’m a junior in high school on a scouting trip to Chicago to visit Northwestern (my dream school) with my dad. Not coincidently, he’s also in town for a board meeting for the startup he recently launched from our basement outside of Boston.
While I didn’t understand the impact of his decision until very recently (now that I work in inclusive innovation), my dad did not blink an eye when inviting his 16 year old daughter to a fancy steakhouse to talk shop with a bunch of middle aged business men. I was so fortunate to understand myself (then and now) to have a proverbial “seat at the table” because of my dad’s simple, subtle gesture to show and not tell me what true inclusion feels like. I try and emulate this behavior everyday.
COMMITMENT
Fast forward to 2009. After getting into my dream school on a full ride…I dropped both my Navy ROTC scholarship and Northwestern, transferred to a small liberal arts college, and have decided on philosophy as my academic track. Reframed from my dad’s prospective, I left a top 10 university, a full ride and a guaranteed job at the height of the recession to study, of all things, philosophy.
When he was able to pick his jaw up off the floor (What do philosopher’s do to eat???), my dad didn’t just “support my decision”. He, despite having already received three degrees from the most prestegious universities in the country, really supported me by growing with me. He read all the books I was assigned, read all of the papers I wrote, and traded emails back and forth about our philosophical, ethical, and political differences.
What this taught me, and what I carry in my work every day still, is to never stop learning, never stop listening, and never stop engaging deeply with the people who share their thoughts, trials, and triumphs with you. Don’t just give “support” lip service — commit to it.
INTEGRATION
In a recession economy, cheap labor is worth it’s weight in gold. So, instead of “Bring Your Kids to Work Day”, my dad, in his startup, opted instead for “Put Your Kids to Work Everyday”. My siblings and I were some of the first employees at 2Is. We tried our hand at manual labor, engineering, software QA, internal auditing, sales, technical writing, etc., etc., etc.
At the time, of course this translated to me as “beer money! excellent!”. but, reflecting on the many summers and winter breaks and spousal deployments spent working in his startup, my dad accomplished more than cheap labor. He opened up his world to us and gave us the opportunity to spend as much time as we could manage together. And, he equipped us with the confidence and versatile skill set so that even his black sheep philosophy major daughter could someday work with startups, too.
Today, my dad and I share many things — from conversations about our runway, to migraines and, of course, Manhattans. As I continue to grow in my professional and personal life, I am so proud and thankful to have a dad to guide and support me every step of the way.
P.S. Happy Fathers, Day (and welcome to Medium, Dad!)
