Rejectress Submission: Hannah Dobrogosz
Reductress didn’t laugh, but will you?
1. Are You Truly Happy or Are You Just Having Regular Bowel Movements?
A puzzled woman tries to find the root of her new-found happiness. “I began wondering if any of us know true happiness. It can’t be a coincidence that I’m living my best life the same week I buy a bushel of pears.”
2. Clothes to Make from the Red Flags You’ve Collected from Men
A remarkable self-help guide for women looking to repurpose the red flags they’ve collected from their relationships with men. “So what if Matt won’t stop texting his ex? At least now I have this cute new kerchief!”
3. Local Woman Mistakes Distressed Denim for “Boyfriend Material”
A woman shares her shock and heartbreak as she recounts her romantic blunder. “Rough around the edges with a few soft spots… isn’t that what every woman wants? I can’t believe I was so blind.”
4. Quarantine Hack! Eat an Edible and Sleep for Two Days Straight!
A quick and easy hack for silencing the screaming in your head. “I slept through another Trump scandal?”
5. Wow! Guy From the Bar to Offer Free Lesson on Tarantino Films
A shocking account of one woman’s journey from girl’s night out to Intro to Film lecture, all without leaving the bar. “He went from buying me shots to describing how Pulp Fiction was shot! If only I had taken notes.”
Vote for Hannah Dobrogosz’s headlines by clicking ‘like’ on Humor Darling’s post with Hannah’s name!
