High-five to the underdog
A story of struggle over adversity
Battle 1: Divorce
A surprisingly easy battle due to having already suffered the pain of betrayal years earlier. She was younger then and the excitement of independence, the new freedom and the strength of her maternal instincts for her two young children hid the cruelty of losing her relative wealth and security. A rugby team of supporting women also obliterated any fears of being alone. The world was her playground and she took the opportunity bravely, moving to China within a few months.
Battle 2: Eastern promise
Not what you’d think. Beauty. Ugliness. Honesty. Corruption. Overall an eye-opening but unforgettable experience. Standing infront of a Chinese Public Security Bureau Officer she screamed at him to return her children’s passports — and he did — a highlight. Standing on the original Great Wall at Huanghuacheng, not the 15 year old bricks just along from the circus of black bears languishing forlornly at Badaling! Sleeping on board a regular ferry while it meandered through the Three Gorges on the Yangtse River. Priceless. $30 in fact. At the turning point she got to spend a few incredible hours in one of the villages soon to be flooded when the dam was complete. An old lady gave her golden-haired daughter a butterfly brooch as the local schoolteacher translated her words explaining how she refused to move into the concrete hell the government were forcing her into. She left her wondering if the old lady would remain as the water rose around her ancient home as it disappeared under the river like the Yangtse Dolphins.
Battle 3: Child Support
TEN whole years after her divorce the government finally enforces payments from the absent father to help towards the rising costs of teenagers. She smiled, only for their faces as they unwrapped the presents she could now afford Christmas morning.
Battle 4: Cancer
She read up more on the condition arming herself for facing the horror. The cancer had started to affect her brain and as she lay there motionless she’d read that sufferers could still hear, still see partially and might be able to blink. She promised to look after her son and asked her to blink if she could hear her. The eyes of the beautiful mother of her boyfriend blinked in response. A few days later she watched her take her last breath and sat humbly by as the ‘ugly stepsister’ arrived and took over the family.
Battle 5: More Cancer
It hit her like a brick. But more for the disbelief because her Mother was both the Rock and the Lighthouse and how would she see her way through without her? She watched her deal with the annoyance. She watched her go through radiation therapy, taking with her each day, a new card to open from friends, collected by her son so she wouldn’t feel alone when the laser was aimed at her abdomen. She was overjoyed with the letter when it arrived saying the battle had been won. She was equally destroyed when a test six months later showed a fingernail-sized bullet into her soul. Chemotherapy was recommended, ‘just a small dose to wittle away anything missed’ they said. Knowing the ravaging effects of chemo she fought against the advice. Her mother listened quietly but ultimately admitted she wasn’t brave enough to go against the consultants advice. She had no qualifications to contest. She only had her instincts. So she sat with her mother when they pumped the steroids into her veins to prevent them collapsing in a last frail attempt to stop the toxicity from poisoning her body. She left her with the sounds of Frank Sinatra to while away the long hours through the night till she could collect her the next day. She brought the open-top Jeep so the Summer breeze could blow through her hair before it started to fall out. 3 days later she was dead. Her heart failed as she sat down to a meal. The toxicity was too much for her. She knew even before she arrived at her mothers house. After she’d called the Police to check on her because the drive would take over an hour. The Police found her mother and advised her not to go into the room. She never saw her Mother again except in her dreams.
Battle 6: Dishonour
It was another letter, another review needed. This time they wanted to know what the large sum was that had been deposited in her bank account. Inheritance. She was being accused of fraud. Again. After preparing the paperwork and this time seeking advice for what was beginning to look like harassment she sat nervously as the suited man set up the recording device. Suddenly the fire alarm went off. Everyone rushed outside and the solicitor laughed out loud because he knew how much this would annoy the precise compulsive man about to interrogate her. The man who then apologised for spending a year on the case only to find out she was totally innocent. A year?
Battle 7: Euthanasia
He’d been passed from family to family and this particular one finally offered him to anyone who’d take him. He was scared of water, scared of ducks and petrified of the vacuum cleaner but was forty kilograms of viciousness to anything he saw as a threat to her safety. She’d wanted him since she was a teenager. Admired their loyalty and majesty. She was lucky enough to know him for just over four years, to go for long walks in the countryside with him every day and to leave him in charge of her house and children when she went to work every day. She knew his every move, his every sound and when she came home that day and he was stood waiting for her she smiled. When he lay down and couldn’t get up again she wept. When she lifted his dead weight into the car, with the help of her son she knew how little time he had left. When the vet said it would be kinder she knew she had no choice yet the choice was hers and she had to make it. Had to play God and kill this magnificent animal that had come into her life only a few days before she lost her Mother. Tears fell for days and days. There would always be regret. This was a choice she would always be responsible for.
Battle 8: Ego
They awarded her £50,000. That was enough to know she was on the right path. The recruitment followed. The dream became reality. An amazing team was born, building her ideas into reality. They worked harder than ever, enjoying the hours and the thorough training. The kit arrived, the students arrived, the grounds were laid and then the bureaucrats came. After four long years, even before they could officially begin, her community interest company was dead. The supporters resigned in protest, the partners failed, the perpetrators laughed. But not for long. The truth came out. The consequences started to take shape. The selfishness and the discontent started to filter through the entire system until — she was told — they offered him ‘garden leave’. Dishonorable discharge to the bully who caused the downfall. A tough lesson in politics.
Battle 9: Trust
They were older now, they pleaded not to have someone staying at the house. They had neighbours across the road, they’d be good, they’d be fine. ‘Pleeeease‘ they pleaded. They were her babies but she knew them and trusted them and she finally left them for 2 nights with strict instructions. Strict instructions that, like she should have known, they never followed. The party was epic. Best time ever. One of the young party-goers knew it would be — knew he wouldn’t want to leave early so he lied to his parents about the sleepover. He was caught out. The parents didn’t know her. They didn’t know anything about the values and the way she had brought up her children. They were just angry that their child had lied. They threw the book at her. Accused her of child neglect. It was ridiculous but they were angry. But it didn’t stop there. The authorities visited and procedure meant she was interrogated. They belittled her, made her feel like a criminal. She tried to explain how her children had just been travelling around Africa with her, playing with orphans who never had parents. Never had the luxuries or the protection. How her children were just being children. She tried to explain how far from the truth their accusations were but they were ignorant, had no idea of worlds outside their own conflict-based lives. She left in tears. They were wrong. She recovered and became stronger. The survivor instinct took hold. She held them to account. She brought in higher powers and fought hard for her name. The Chief of Police resigned but not before repairing her reputation, in writing.
Battle 10: Mathematics
University is demanding. You survive on near-zero money, near-zero sleep and near-zero food because of the near-zero money, near-zero …….. If you also have children to feed then its harder on another order of magnitude. She took it in her stride. It was half-term. She knew she had four outstanding courseworks to finish so went in anyway and did 12-14 hour days to fulfill her obligations. The mathematics was sprawled out over an obscene 18-page document. The PhD ‘marker’ was not going to be happy she thought to herself as she handed it in. He wasn’t. This was one of forty-two other scripts he had to mark on top of his own research that day. She’d used the work of another mathematician to illustrate her understanding of the answers, referenced him in the diagrams she’d included. They were hyperlinked but she hadn’t put footnotes in the document because she’d been in a rush to finish and submit and move onto the next deadline.
The PhD marked her down and accused her of plagiarism. The lecturer was now forced to follow protocol but she had suffered this defamatory process too many times before. She knew the format. She had to defend her name. Again. The lecturer said it wasn’t serious but her placement with CERN was too precious for this to be allowed to escalate. Rather than play the underdog again she planned her response, her strategy, her line of attack. She tore into the bias of systems designed for people who were completely opposite to her. People who lie and cheat. People who neglect their responsibilities, take the easiest option, play it safe if they even bothered to play at all.
She also realised she was no longer the underdog. All these battles, all these years, had slowly been building up her defences, strengthening her and teaching her how to win the game called Life. She continues to fight….
