Imagining a Jack and Jackie conversation

From another world that might be Camelot

“So Jackie, it’s been 50 years since, well, since that day.”

“Yes, Jack. Yes. I endured remembering and re-living all of it for nearly 31 of those years. Even when I was with Ari and then Maurice.”

“I know. I know. But, we’re all over everywhere now, all sorts of new books, all of those special magazine issues, movies, TV specials. Though I cannot imagine cable and the Internet being around when I was president. You know, I even have my own Twitter feed now, though when I look at the pictures they use of me, I wish I had had longer hair.”

“You may be right, Jack. Bobby looked great in longer hair. I cannot believe I have my own Twitter accounts too, though I cannot think of having one if I were down there still. I’m the one who never wanted to write an autobiography, even when I was trying to encourage others to write one for me when I was at Doubleday. Still, it’s terribly interesting to think about how all of that social media would have affected you while you were still in office. Twitter probably would have been a good way to promote the nuclear Test Ban Treaty and the Peace Corps, but then there were your women, of course, who knows what they might have tweeted about you. And just think if social media had been around when all of that Woodward and Bernstein investigative journalism became the rage after Watergate.”

“Yes, Jackie. You are right, of course. Twitter would have been a good way to promote the Peace Corps, especially among young people. But I do wish so much of this talk going on down there about us would focus more on what I tried to do, how close we really came to annihilation during the Cuban Missile Crisis, how I knew Vietnam was going to become a horrid, deadly nightmare, how good it was for the U.S. to work toward going to the moon, and that your restoration of the White House was much more about restoring proper history than just buying furniture and drapes.”

“Absolutely. I too wish they would look at more than my pillbox hats, your sailing and brilliant humor, and our daiquiris. Although some of them are doing so, I should be fair. However, speaking of daiquiris, I wouldn’t mind having one now, maybe at the old Sans Souci, with some cold poached salmon for lunch.”

“That was a good place, I remember it well. It’s gone now. A cold daiquiri would be delicious but it would probably go right through us at this point. But speaking of Watergate, I still feel bad for poor Dick Nixon. It’s one thing to lose an election, but to have to resign after you tell people you’re not a crook. Of course, he never really recovered from wearing that La-Z-Shave during his first debate with me in 1960. And Pat and her sorry little Republican cloth coat. But Jerry Ford wasn’t the worst president ever, though I almost fell to the Earth when I saw him photographed, as president, wearing red plaid slacks and white shoes. Suffice it to say that not everyone who ever inhabited the White House had your elegance, Jackie.”

“You always knew I was elegant. You did, and I knew it, deep down.”

“Well, yes, but, well…Anyway, it’s really marvelous that people are still so interested in me, in you too, of course, in all that happened. And to think almost no one wanted to go to Texas in the first place. To think none of us wanted to go, especially after we lost little Patrick.”

“No, no one wanted to go. But I always said I was grateful I was there with you. Poor Clint Hill. So many of the books that have been written about us are pure drivel and filler for the river of sludge but I am so glad Mr. Hill finally told his story. And with such grace. He suffered so much. He never forgave himself for not jumping on the car even faster than he did.”

“He did his very best, Jackie. I know you told him so. He deserves all of the praise he’s getting right now. And that writer who works with him, Lisa McCubbin. She seems quite intelligent, as well as attractive.”

“Yes, Jack, she is attractive. And a very good writer. You know I know writing, you do remember that I was a real editor, for two large publishing houses. Though I will admit I am delighted you retain your eye for quality, even from on high.”

“My God, Jackie. You still really pack a punch behind that breathless voice. Though you look even lovelier now than you did when de Gaulle couldn’t stop looking at you in that Givenchy gown.”

“Thanks. It’s the spirit in me. At least de Gaulle treated you with some measure of respect, which we can’t say was the case when you met with Khruschev.”

“Very clever, Jackie. Still, I will admit much of this new attention is welcome, if only to possibly balance and enrich the historical record. But I do wish there was more we could do to help those still on the Earth. I feel for Barack Obama and that non-functioning health care website, all of those problems in the Middle East, climate change, an economy that is close to being as bad as it was during the Depression, and the fact that the country has become so very violent. And to think I proposed universal health care all the way back in 1962. Teddy worked almost his entire ass off trying to bring it about, and he did do a great job. Much more than I thought the Little Brother could do.”

“You know, of course, that our Caroline thinks very highly of Barack Obama. She said he reminded her of you when she endorsed him in 2008.”

“Jackie, where do you think much of that ‘change we can believe in’ oratorical grace came from, hmm? The man is extremely bright and talented, that is certain, but I don’t mind saying he took a lot of inspiration from me. Though I’ve still got him beat on inaugural addresses. But he was quite right to make Caroline ambassador to Japan. She is going to do a fantastic job, I know it, even though she’ll always be my Buttons.”

“That would be Ambassador Buttons, Jack. And as much as I miss her, I hope she has many more years to keep making us proud. I am so happy she has accomplished so much. And she’ll look beautiful in a kimono too.”

“She would indeed. But Jackie, I am still thinking about whether you believe any of those historians and amateur assassination investigators will ever figure out who really did it? I mean, we know, we know all too well. We can’t tell them but I do wonder if any of them will ever realize the truth.”

“You know how history and time blend in an often difficult to understand concoction, Jack. You also know how humans love controversy. I think they’ll be talking conspiracy for many years yet to come, though the day will come when no one who was alive then will still be around and it will be a very different sort of conversation.”

“I think you’re right. But what really matters is that people realize what we tried to do, what I tried to do.”

“Jack, I think they do. That’s why we’re still so popular. Everyone still wants to be Jack and Jackie. We did have great style and sunglasses and charisma. But there was more.”