Uniquely Genuine
The paradox of trying to be unique in the world
Deep down, the things we all really want most are love and acceptance. That’s it. Strangely, it’s practically universal. We want others to care about our existence. We want people to think: “Hey, they’re not so bad.”
To gain this love and acceptance, we all want to be unique. “After all,” we think, “if someone just like me can be found on any street corner, why would anyone care about who I really am?”
So we create a plan. A unique plan.
“What can I do to stand out above the rest? What will make others think I’m the coolest?”
“Ah, I know. I’ll make a lot of money and be famous for something. That has to be it. If I show everyone that I can do something they can’t, they will respect me! If the paparazzi follow me around, it must mean that someone thinks my life is significant. Right?”
So, we get really excited about these goals. We start thinking about how we can achieve them. Inevitably, we enter situations where our dream goes up against someone else’s dream. After all, their “unique” plan also coincidentally calls for luxury and fame. We learn the art of stepping over people. Kissing ass. Politics. Manipulation. Getting what we want. We see others that have what we crave, and we become green with envy. We pick at their flaws and talk badly about them with others.
The desire to be superior to others is a losing game. Statistically, in a hypothetical world where 7 billion people strive to be the richest or most famous, 6,999,999,999 people would become cold-hearted, aggressive, rude, egotistical, jealous, phony, backstabbing, overly-competitive narcissists.
Ironically, in this quest that began as an attempt to be unique and gain acceptance, each person ends up doing the exact same things as everyone else. And sadly, most of the dominant personality traits that get picked up along the way are repulsive, causing the opposite of love and acceptance.
Rather than waking up and seeing reality for what it is, this causes everyone to fall deeper into the slumber. The lack of perceived personal recognition only causes everyone to compete even harder, causing the chaotic stampede to accelerate its pace. Negative thoughts grow into negative self-images, which perpetuate negative personal habits, negative relationships, negative families, negative music, negative news, negative business models, and a negative quality of life for the majority of the citizens of planet earth.
Stepping over people to attempt to achieve some form of “success” and be cool can never create true love and acceptance. In fact, it’s the fastest way to be forgotten, because THAT’S WHAT NEARLY EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING. High school was supposed to last for four years, not four plus decades.
Damn it. So the plan didn’t work. I’ll never be as rich as Bill Gates. I’ll never be as famous as Michael Jordan.
Oh, there’s another person walking right next to me. I wasn’t really paying attention. I was too busy in my own head thinking about what a failure my entire life has been. Hmm. They look really stressed out..
Is it possible… that their mind is cycling through the same bullshit mine is?
“You look really tense. I’ve been stuck in my head all day in a thought loop about all of the things I don’t have, all the dreams that never worked out the way I wanted them to, about how much further I thought I’d be at this point in my life than I am. About the things I hate about my job. About frivolous things I have to remember to do to keep up this lifestyle that I don’t really enjoy all that much. I’m just really tired of it all. I’m tired of putting up a front and pretending like things are great when I feel like a failure inside. When I saw the look of distress on your face, I was wondering if, by some strange chance, you were thinking about something similar.”
“Wow. That was amazing! Are you a psychic or something?”
“Not really. I just snapped out of my thoughts for a brief second and noticed that you looked a little stressed right now. And so am I. So I wanted to share those thoughts and let you know that you’re not alone. And that hopefully tomorrow will be an amazing day for you.”
“I don’t know what to say. I definitely needed this. Thank you.”
“Hey, let’s hang out sometime. You know. Do something fun. Something where we can just enjoy life and forget about all of these pressures we put on ourselves to be perfect societal specimens.”
“Absolutely. That sounds great.”
“You know, in the entire time I’ve lived in this city, I’ve noticed that there are a plethora of self aggrandizing big shots, people with fancy titles, flashy items, and overly refined physiques on every corner. This is the first time I’ve met someone genuine, kind, and empathetic. You have no idea how rare that is. I hope you never lose that. More people should be like you.”
A Deep Thought From The Universe
Everyone Has A Gift For The World
Why Everyone Should Try Meditation
Email me when I. M. H. O. publishes stories