Working Mums — How do you do it?

You know what? I’m a mum. I work when I can. Well by that I mean I am a Graphic Designer but I have another job. My other work is my children! So that’s drop offs, pick ups, after-school activities, homework, lunches, uniforms and somewhere in between I design. I wish I had the lovely long 7 or 8 hours a day most people do when working. I have a couple of hours in the morning and a few after kids bedtime and I get what I can, done and I spend every single afternoon with my kids. I won’t feel ashamed of this any longer.

The number of times people ask How Do You Do It? My answer is I Don’t Know. I guess if I didn’t have my work I’d be a bit loop de loop. I love it. It’s my escape. But I am very conscious that clients do not like it — they feel that because I have children I cannot possibly give them what they want. To date, I have never let one client down. Never. I am so used to the dramatic cavernous silences on telephone conversations when I mention family. Its like: why would you even bring this up? But sometimes I have to because they need to know I am not available the luxurious full day at the office.

Yesterday I basically lost a client cause I couldn’t be at his beck and call 24 hours a day. He didn’t like it when I couldn’t take a call when I’m usually running up a hill at the school to do my first collection of the day. He told me it was fine, that he’d be in touch…but that was after a lengthy conversation about giving family what they need and “Maybe It Was The Wrong Time”. Also, the theme of the day, “How Do You Do It?” I am so upset cause I know that I had to call him after everyone was in bed as he asked and while he was very understanding I almost, almost felt guilty for having children. He told me not to worry. But I did.

I am a designer. I am a mother. Why is it I can’t be both? Why is it such a taboo that I have kids? Why is it not accepted that I work because I enjoy it, cause I never let my clients down and that I never miss deadlines. I CAN do both and I do it very well. In fact its because I have children that I feel I am better creatively. Seriously. Children have changed me. I sometimes don’t recognise myself but it made me into someone who can manage stressful situations a lot better, I never sweat the small stuff, I pick my battles, problem solve and multi-task…certainly things that were foreign to me before children. And why is it that its is perceived that I must wait until my children are in college before I can resume a career. I want my own financial independence and I don’t see anything wrong with that either.

Here’s how I ‘do it’ and I’m not hiding this information any more.

I get up at 7.15 every morning. I get kids fed and out by 8.30. All drop offs done by 9. I am at home doing household work/grocery shopping until my youngest takes a nap. Then I sit at my iMac and complete designer work, emails and finish any other work I need. At 1pm, I run off to collect my second born son. Then I come home for 15 minutes, then I go back out and pick up first born son. Then I come home and usually to the loud shrill of my toddler girl I try get through homework with both boys. They are given a snack, I cook dinner. I watch the front door for my husband to come home…he never comes home before 7 but I live in hope…every day. After dinner, I clean up, watch some Peppa Pig with the aforementioned todder and get her to bed by 7pm. Then I allow my sons to play games or watch tv or go on the iPad and I hit the iMac again and sometimes I work till midnight. That’s it. 2 days a week the toddler has crèche in the morning so I get way more done on those days. I do not, I repeat, do not feel I am depriving my clients of anything and I never make promises I can’t keep. I am able to get work done over-night! I have a client in Brazil. My working hours are his also!

I am a Designer. I have this business and I want to grow this business I can do what my clients want and I LOVE what I do and I LOVE my kids and they exist, they make me and that basically is how I do it. Why is it not accepted that I work because I enjoy it, because I never let my clients down and that I never miss deadlines. My kids don’t suffer and I can manage both. I CAN do both and I do it very well.

PS: My kids are AWESOME!!! Best design work I ever did.